"A lack of patient centred care"

I am the NOK and main carer for my elderly uncle who is intensely private & lives alone. I am also a health care worker. He woke up 6 weeks ago with a very sore shoulder. GP excellent- arranged to see him and referred to A&E . X-ray confirmed fracture. I had concerns that he had no recollection of a fall to cause the fracture. The A&E consultant wanted to discharge him, but arranged care of elderly follow-up. 

Two weeks later he was admitted having gone into urinary retention. He’s now been in 4 wards in 14 days. There have been a few lovely members of staff who have listened and recognised that an elderly person with a badly fractured dominant arm and a new catheter would struggle at home. Mainly however there have been a succession of individuals who don’t seem to "see" my uncle, only a bed being utilised by a reserved old man with a sling and a catheter and try to work out how to free up the bed. He has been reviewed by AHPs all focussing on discharge planning - none on the fact that he cannot use his right arm now in hospital. No signage above the bed alerting staff to help cut his food or raise a bed side to help him help himself to get up - I’ve now asked for this is each new ward with no result. No physio guided exercises for his broken arm. He’s been in bays with agitated and confused fellow patients and has had multiple disturbed nights. His mood is low 

Handover between the 4 wards has been either nonexistent or factually wrong . There’s been no continuity of approach to how to manage the cause of his catheter (constipation) .  Calling the wards (which I have limited to once every couple of days)  is frustrating. They are very busy so either don’t answer or when they do , you are asked to call back when the appropriate person might be free . When you do speak to someone the information can be factually incorrect - which further undermines any confidence in the system. I get more accurate info from my uncle than from the staff.

My uncle has taken on board the following messages - that he is using a bed needed for sicker people, and that a catheter will make life easier at home - both delivered by medical staff .One staff member after no introduction asked me if my uncle speaks. The correct answer was yes he is in fact fluent in several languages … but of course I simply introduced my uncle directly to the doctor whose name we never discovered.

I understand that the system is under huge pressure. I understand that health care workers are exhausted and hospitals full . 

However I don’t understand why so much basic patient centred care appears to have been abandoned . This is a frail elderly and frightened old man who like all patients deserves consistent and kind care that focusses on his concerns and maximises the opportunity to assess his medical problems properly, manage them appropriately in order to get him home & living independently again. 

It’s not good enough. If he were younger or had a defined illness and was in a specialised ward I’m sure he’d get better care. But he’s old and frail with multiple things needing looked at, so has been shunted from pillar to post for several weeks.

There have been some lovely individuals along the way who have been kind & considerate . But their efforts unfortunately don’t mitigate an experience which thus far has been awful for my uncle and for me. I’ve always believed in the NHS - but it now appears to be broken and not fit for a frail elderly man.