"Wishaw - good and awful"

I was at wishaw general due to bleeding in early pregnancy. Unfortunately I miscarried. The ultrasound tech that done my scan was so lovely and caring. 

After a week of letting things progress naturally I was in agony and the bleeding was too heavy so I was told to come in to maternity triage late at night. A nurse greeted me and honestly felt like I was being looked after by a very close family member, they were unbelievable. So kind, caring and didn’t listen to my apologies for a second. They were so sympathetic and genuinely could not have done any more to make my time better. If I hadn’t known any better I would have thought I was the only patient, they were so attentive, I’ve never met a nurse like this. They also gave me a covid test. It was negative.

After that I was passed to early pregnancy in the morning. I found the nurse awful. They watched me in agony, made me sit in a ward where I could see bumps everywhere, and told me 'I’d had my lot' when I said I was in pain. Despite not having gas and air, and not having had anything for around 6 hours. 

After about half an hour, the same ultrasound tech as last time gave me an ultrasound and unfortunately they would need to intervene. They were so lovely and kept saying sorry I was going through this etc. 

This ultrasound tech then went out and demanded pain meds from the nurse that was rude as I hadn’t had any in ages and I was being left in pain. I got them in seconds.

I then got passed on to a doctor, the doctor started examining me, which was painful but I could deal with it, they suggested gas and air and a lovely nurse brought a portable unit. The exams were extremely rough but I knew they had to be as they were trying to get tissue from my cervix. They then called another doctor about getting a vacuum procedure done.

They explained on the phone that I was in so much pain and had been for days, and they thought I would not tolerate it well, the doctor on the line didn’t seem to care.

I explained I had a negative covid test but the doctor was refusing to do the procedure under general anaesthetic. I told them that due to my condition EDS, local anaesthetic didn’t work. Too bad apparently.

I was moved to the labour ward where I heard babies crying and saw women with huge baby bumps, quotes about birthing babies were on the walls etc 

The doctor met us there, gave me a form, told me to sign it, said I’d be there for 20 minutes then started the procedure letting me know they would be getting rid of the “tissue”.

I struggle writing this part as it was horrific, I panic and cry whenever I think of it, I sat alone in this room with nurses and doctors (my partner wasn’t allowed in) and I felt (only word I can use) tortured. As predicted the local anaesthetic didn’t work, I felt everything. I spent nearly two hours in agony, actually screaming. Nobody offered to stop or ask if I was ok. I made it very clear I was feeling everything and in agony. After over an hour of this, they took me back to my partner and he rushed over as I was in tears and white as a ghost. I couldn’t even tell him what happened. I then got sent home. 

I am now pregnant again and terrified of doctors, hospitals etc.

Do you know how it feels to have someone ignore you while you scream? It was so unnecessary. 

I am deeply scarred by this.