"The effects of idiopathic Anaphylaxis"

Well hello all, my story started some time ago, around 15 years when I had my  first real anaphylactic shock episode, it turned my whole world upside down. I was an ordinary bloke, obviously indestructible, impervious to anything and was going to live forever ? or there or there about's.

I had suffered with a real gluten intolerance for a couple of years previous (but I think I had had it all my life) and looking back neither had ever been on my radar. Idiopathic Anaphylaxis!? I had never heard of it before, yes reaction to peanuts , penicillin or bee stings I get that, but idiopathic?  means 'unknown', its turns out my body seems to be producing to many histamines and when it gets too much the next thing I digest can set it off with a boom, my body just goes into shock, however it doesn't  mean I cant eat the same thing again or something I have eaten before wont effect me, its just seems to be what ever the state my histamines are at the time denotes whether I react so i couldn't even avoid foods that might do it .

'Idiopathic Anaphylaxis' is a life threatening condition and let me tell you of the 10 -15 times I've had an real attack, 5 have been near fatal, the rest mind blowing. so what's been the upshot of these attacks, (the last being the most serious ,when I got to hospital after the ambulance had used all of their supplies of Epinephrine on route my oxygen levels were at 70% I believe 85% to be very dangerous at one point that little pesky voice in my head said well done themase that's enough just let go (never the other voice said)),

Well pure and utter fear of dying, fear of drowning in my own thickened lungs, fear of my family watching me suffocate in front of them, after this I waited and waited for the inevitable, each day eating away at my resolve until pop! the weight of this on me was too great, me who never gives up who can 'out think' anything, who believed totally in my own abilities to conquer any and all issues that could arise,  was, in this instance broken and  in need of help and more over some moral support. I had reached the  preverbal 'hands up I surrender' moment, I was lost, my mind was fixated on the next attack when where would it be? who knows? this lead me to the Inclusion course.

Being able to enrol on the  inclusion course and see a wonderful person whom has really refocused my mind and my life has and will forever be invaluable, I was totally committed 100% and this I think was key, why would I question anything that I was told, I had no idea how to deal with this myself. the help I received has made me realise that life is never about tomorrow but today that we are not indestructible but human and we all at some point need a little help. My days now are not full of 'when am i  going to die today' but 'how shall I live today' I looked for support and found it, and i have come away with many things from this experience, one of the most poignant being (especially in this day and age) is, 'talking is for the wise'....