"Poorly run practice"

Whilst under this team I was after being transferred from a good team as moved out of area my care was broken down and because of the newly diagnosis eupd ment waterford house didn't have to help me I was also diagnosed with anxiety and ptsd from a child I was constantly told when in crises or as I call it my switches where it doesn't feel like me controlling it and my mental health goes out of hand and I start hearing and seeing things I'm told I have the capacity to kill myself because I under stand what taking an overdose would do yes I understand but do you understand what's causing me to do this or it that you just don't care I've asked for trauma therapy as 99% of my problems have come from my past trauma please tell how this is my fault and why you will not help me when I'm in crises begging for help you have shut down every bit of help I could possibly get because you don't want to listen to me yes I get angry and again I spent 13 years growing up in nothing but an all violent home where my dad would beat us and scream at us 24 hours a day so if you want to know where I get my anger from it's my dad yes I blame my dad and if you had lived my life you would come out with fucked up too all I was asking was for some help but you guys don't belive me how would you feel if you woke up and there was your worst night mare stood by you door of sat by your bed or screaming at you and it's real I can hear and see everything when your going to bed at night and there is 10 different people and 5 different conversations and there speaking so loudly the horrible ringing in the ears the weird sensation that you just want to stop, walking down the road and lamppost turn into people you see shodows that are crossing people behind you that are following you the voice that says your nothing your better of dead none of these people care they only want me dead please tell me if you experienced this would you like if someone said because of a high user care plan that was put in place 2 years ago we won't help you because we don't want to and you have the capacity because I understand what taking tablets is I've been overdosing since I was 13 so yes I knew what taking tablets would do to me then its no different to now but do I have the capacity when it comes to understanding my mental health and my problem probably not you refuse to give me the one therapy that could help me in my future you don't listen about the fact I don't want to do groups I don't want to be around lot of people and that's fine not everyone should be forced into a group do you not think that would make me worse you don't care what I have to say about my life you know the one I'm living everyday it's got to the point where I'm now to scared to phone anyway because waterford house have made sure I get no help when in crisis and to make sure I succeed in killing myself I mean how disgusting can 1 team can truly destroy someones hope of a good future or any future I hate the whole team