"This was not the labour I imagined"

To start with my midwife appointments prior to labour: I had a midwife who I had a good relationship with, they understood my needs. As my pregnancy went on, I was passed from person to person as my original midwife no longer had space for me. These other midwives hadn’t built up that same relationship with me and didn’t understand my wants and needs.

I think around 37 weeks I was completely left alone, no one got in touch with me, no one checked in to see how I was getting on. I had to phone the hospital and ask at 39 weeks, what the plans were regarding labour/induction if pregnancy went on longer! I couldn’t believe I was left to make these decisions on my own.

My water broke and contractions started. They were very quickly not far apart, I could barely talk. I phoned the hospital to say that I also was aware baby movement weren’t as often and that I would also like an epidural. They put me on hold for 10 mins whilst trying to get in touch with the labour ward to see if there was space for me. Finally I was told there was room and off we went to the RAH.

We arrived to triage and they lay me on a bed to monitor the baby, I was in severe pain at the time. I said I wanted an epidural but no one was available to organise this for me. They monitored my baby for 1 hour as baby's heartbeat was sleepy. The staff kept leaving the room and we were on our own the majority of time. My husband kept running out to ask for an epidural but again, no one was available to speak to him, the corridors were empty and when we finally got someone; they said no one was available to take my bloods.

Eventually, I was checked and I had dilated to 3 cm and they considered sending me home; even though I was in so much pain. Eventually a doctor came in and said it’s better for me to stay in because of the baby's movements.

They then sent me through to the labour ward and told me gas and air was available, I had no idea how to use this. I lay there in utter pain with the contractions. No staff in the room. Someone eventually came in and checked the computer and noted something down; then left again.

Eventually the new midwife came in and took over. They asked to check my dilation as they had a feeling… I was 10 cm! I had basically been left alone asking for an epidural and at 10cm with no support or help. I was devastated as all I wanted my whole pregnancy was to have an epidural, as discussed with my original midwife.

I was told that I could have music on, dimmed lights, a relaxing feel for my labour. It was not! The lights were bright, I felt stressed, I wasn’t offered music on. I was in a whole world of fear and don’t recall anyone actually talking to me, apart from the words - push keep going, push push.

This was not the labour I imagined. (I can’t deny that the midwife was probably really nice, I just didn’t feel supported up till this point). I was not comfortable at all lying on my back, I could barely move. I wish I was offered a different position from the start as I felt my whole body was numb and in excruciating pain in the lying down position. (Considering I had been in this position prior to the labour ward, getting baby monitored in triage).

Eventually, the doctor said that baby's head wasn’t facing the right direction and that baby's heart rate was sleepy. I had to sign paperwork for forceps or c-section. They wheeled me through theatre and from there the team were excellent. The anaesthetist was brilliant,  I didn’t feel the spinal go in, the person who kept reassuring me was amazing. I wish I could have thanked them, the doctor was fantastic. My baby came out by forceps.

After waiting in recovery with a catheter I could feel a weird sensation - I knew my bag was full but no one had checked on me. Sure enough, my mum called for someone and my bag was completely full. Again. I was left, bleeding heavily and an overflowing bag. I could go on and on about my experience but I will stop there.