"Gynaecology examination"

 At a recent appointment I had to wait for an hour before the doctor saw me. I was thrilled that finally a female doctor would be examining me and hoped that she would be understanding.

I tried to explain briefly and clearly my previous traumas, existing problems, and how truly worried I was. I asked her to order hormone tests, a full blood count, and the other tests I had mentioned earlier. Instead, she said that she would let me know about my condition at a later date and that she wanted to take a biopsy of the fibroid. Since I had not received any prior notice, I reluctantly agreed.

The doctor then summoned a healthcare assistant and told them that I had experienced a traumatic IUD removal. She then informed me that the assistant would help me. I asked them not to and that I did not want to be talked through the procedure and reassured like you're doing very well, almost finished, etc.

It is important to note that I had not received any information beforehand, including that I could request pain relief, reject the biopsy, or be informed about what the procedure entailed. My only goal was to rule out cancer, so I cooperated as best I could. The doctor promised me that she would stop the procedure immediately if I said anything. I tried to remain calm and focus on my breathing, but the speculum insertion was so painful that I felt unwell. I felt the doctor pushing the biopsy tool into my cervix without any form of pain relief, and I was crying and begging her to stop. However, she did not stop, instead asking me to cough, which I could not do due to the pain. The two women in the room began shouting at me to cough, and it was only when I was sobbing uncontrollably and shouting to stop that the doctor finally said something and stopped the procedure. However, I was too overwhelmed to hear what she said. She apologized, told me it wasn't my fault, and left me to get dressed on my own.

I cried on the bed before getting dressed, and as I dressed, I saw the sample pot floating in clean fluid, containing tissue pieces, which only added to my confusion. I asked the doctor what she thought the problem was, as I had no typical symptoms for menopause or perimenopause, and my cycle was regular, but she did not give me an answer. Instead, she informed me that she would refer me for further investigation, but when I asked what that entailed, she simply said that she had not decided and that she would hand me over to another specialist in the women's hospital.

After the examination I felt terrible, shaking, feeling nauseous, experiencing chest pressure, and reliving previous traumas. Such feelings have persisted, leading to a decline in my quality of life, affecting my ability to sleep and eat, with pulse rates ranging from 133-142 and constantly high stress levels. I cannot concentrate, and I have uncontrollable crying fits. My hands shake, and after 2-3 hours of sleep, I wake up trembling and unable to go back to sleep.

I recently had an MRI of the pelvis appointment. I called the doctor's secretary, who informed me that they had my results and that I would receive them soon. I once again requested to receive the radiologist's report. I asked when I could expect the letter, and they replied that they would send it by the end of the week. I called again after not receiving the letter. Now they said that the letter was ready to be sent and that they had my original report. I called them again, and this time they claimed that they had already sent the letter and that I should have received it. I feel that they spoke to me very rudely and abruptly, but I reiterated that I had not received the letter and requested that they send it again.

I attempted to call the secretary again, but nobody answered despite the long wait. I lost my patience as the deception had become unbearable, and I felt entitled to know my results. Thus, I visited my GP, who informed me that they had received my results and printed out a letter for me. The letter was brief and non-informative. 

So, I did not receive any new information from this letter, and I felt completely distressed by the fact that the date was printed on the letter, indicating that it was not yet ready when they claimed to have already sent it. I had specifically requested information about the report which was not provided. At this point, I was extremely concerned due to what I feel was medical gaslighting, as I had no result, no appointment, and no information concerning my situation. I wanted to contact the doctor's secretary to request information, but fortunately, a kind nurse who was leaving the ward offered help.