"No one listens, no one cares "

I have been treated badly by health professionals my whole life. I feel they don't take me seriously, and don't listen, even when I've took an overdose they just discharged me once they'd got the drugs out of my system, I was discharged with no aftercare or psychological treatment. I wanted help and for someone to listen and take me seriously but no one did. I get told I am pretty all the time, perhaps this is why people take one look at me and think I'm fine, yet they don't feel the pain I am in and how much I suffer inside. Strangers (women) and healthcare professionals (again, women) are mean to me, and this is not my paranoia as my close family partner have noticed this also.

Whats worse is that if you complain to the PCT for not getting any treatment (I am disabled due to a neurological condition but I'm not in a wheelchair) the doctors themselves will make excuses saying I am not old or a baby and therefore can come out to the GP surgery. Just because I look the way I do, ie. young, not in a wheelchair and dressed okay, I am ignored and neglected.

I too, like you, am treated badly by nurses etc who think they are better than me and are rude because I am mentally unwell. When I took an overdose at 16 the doctor was even horrible to me, they don't see or hear my pain.

My view is that I've come to realise no one cares. No one listens. The world is selfish and people only care about themselves. I've learnt that the only person you can count on in this world is yourself. I feel like the world would be better off without me, that the world is so uncaring and selfish that no one would care if i died anyway, I'd just be a statistic and another carcass to dispose of, even in death I would be a burden and inconvenience.

The only person I can count on is myself but I feel like I am going crazy and alls I can think about is killing myself, so I cant even count on myself. I have no one, no one listens, my family are controlling and have contributed to me developing anorexia, it's a catch 22 because I feel alone so I need them but when I go to them it makes me feel worse because they try to run my life. Even a psychiatrist has told me to stay away from my parents as they are detrimental to my mental and physical health, therefore I am completely alone. I feel trapped in a life I don't want, if I killed myself of go to hell (not even god would love me) but if I stay I just feel too much misery and pain. And I don't know why sometimes.

I hate how the uncaring nurses and doctors are, every time they're mean it just reaffirms that I should just kill myself because no one likes me or cares about me. If someone is reading this and feels the NHS or just people in general have failed you, you are not alone, I hope you get better and I am sending out my love to anyone that is suffering like I am.