"A&E Visit This week"

I had been suffering from what may well be Trigeminal Neuralgia brought on by Sjogrens Syndrome leading to very rapid decline in my dental state. (Excutiating pain across my face from my jaw and into my ear... ) I had an urgent appointment at the GP the day before where my medication dosage was increased with nil effect. By the following day it was even more unbearable - I self medicated with the pretty hefty set of medication I already have (due to abdominal hernia issues with regular partial blockages) Fentanyl, Oramorph, Codeine, Paracetamol and Aspirin - all to NO EFFECT therefore called 111. They called me back and advised that because they at the OOH Unit at Savernake didn't have the pain relief I would require, to go to A&E at GWH.

I arrived late evening, approx 11pm. There were a few people in the waiting room but not many and some weren't there to be seen but were awaiting news of relatives. I was seen fairly quickly by Triage and was given a further 5mls of Oramorph, which did absolutely nothing. At approximately 1am, I asked where I was in the 'queue' and what the waiting time was like as I was still in abject agony and on the point of tears. A receptionist went to have a look and on her return said "there are about another 10 people to be seen before you, and anyway you will only get some Paracetamol and then not before 3am"

The prospect of waiting another 2 hours for something that I had already tried did not fill me with any great confidence that my needs were going to be met that night, so my friend took me back home for me to, in desperation, basically overdose on what analgesia I had left.

I had a letter from my GP specifically to take into the hospital if I need to go (which I avoid until I am absolutely desperate), stating that I am 'significantly tolerant to analgesia' which I had brought with me, but didn't even have the chance to discuss it.

It used to be, when I had a stoma blockage, that I would come in and get an injection of Cyclizine and Diamorphine which took the pain away, sleep for a couple of hours whilst it passed, and go home within the 4 hours target. Now whenever anyone I know goes in, you get 2 Paracetamol, then wait, Codeine, then wait Tramadol, and so on and so on - keeps the patient in agony and keeps them in a bed longer! I am sure that there are people who do go to hospital to try to get given these and get a high from them - but that is NOT me - I wish!!

I am a trained Nurse, I am not stupid and I know my own body, useless as it is. I went for help, and got nothing, and it led me to doing something I shouldn't have done - BUT WHAT CHOICE DID I HAVE???