"I feel they have given up on me."

I have been discharged from from the out patient clinic in psychiatry. I am an attender of the staying well group that psychiatry referred me to. It is useful to a limited extent. But I will still ultimately be very unwell. A negative attitude I know but I am trying to view things more positively. Its not working too well. But my condition remains highly debilitating and severely affects my daily activities.I can't start working or a job while this condition remains as severe. Too much anxiety to drive too. Social anxiety levels are overwhelming very often still. So i am not living a normal life and have very limited money through Employment support allowance though I  spend the limited money efficiently. Wanting my life back.

 I am on two medications for Generalised Anxiety Disorder but also suffer from a high level of depression.  I have requested my particular anti-psychotic medication be changed to another one or different class of medication. An unpleasant side effect suffered. The reason for this being extreme weight gain of 3 stone in 5 or 6 months. Only started when I went on this particular medication. This request of medication change has been refused. This is significantly affecting my confidence and adding to my depressive mind and anxiety.  And my anti-depressant medication is at its maximum allowed dose. It is also of limited effectiveness but possibly some improvement. 

I have also previously seen an occupational therapist and received CBT. Little benefit achieved so therapy was suggested to end by my therapist. The actual therapist was good at their job, very professional, knew their stuff and i got on well with them.  

A major problem is that I have tried numerous medications with little effectiveness.

 It seems to me that the psychiatric practise has essentially given up on me and the only leeway to alter the medication allowed by psychiatry is to increase the dose of the medication that is causing the weight gain. I am getting exercise which is limited by other conditions and following a healthy diet according to a dietician. Limiting my calorie intake but the BMI is still at obesity level and little if any weight lost in last few months. 

So I am in a state of limbo. Still suffering a lot from my conditions that are significantly affecting my daily functionality. The mental illness is still causing me a very high and unacceptable level of suffering. This has been the case for 10 years. Way too long. I feel hopeless and useless. Nothing is working. I am have been trying very hard to use all options to get better. Still in a very bad sate though. I am still suicidal often. 

Disappointed at getting discharged. As I feel my medication needs revised. I even got a second opinion from a different psychiatrist but they won't change my treatment. I know a lot of options have been tried but I feel they have given up on me. Not happy with this at all. I don't expect any miracle cure but I do need further treatment in my opinion and the medication altered if possible. I've done some very extensive research on the subject and there does appear to be other options that are being medicinally ignored.