"I only get to see a doctor every 4 months iv..."

Offered any counselling only pills . I was seeing a dr atam for about 5 years but he upped and went I didn’t know anything till I went to my nxt appointment . Iv seen 2 different doctors since , I used to have a caret who visit me twice a month but she went on long term sick and I was never given another one . I feel really let down by the mental health team . I was supposed to visit c& e centre last week but was to unwell , no one has tried to get hold of me to see if I’m ok . My family have been through hell and can’t put them through the pain I feel . I’m 59 years old living alone I’m really struggling with isolation and loneliness . I’m sure kill me in the end , suicidal thoughts are mainly due to loneliness . I don’t want to put my kids. Through the pain of suicide but I feel I put them through more by being alive . Crisis team what can I say the last time I phoned them it was 3 days before they turned up . So many families are suffering due to lack of care I feel my family , my children are going to suffer because of my illness because I cannot see a way forward apart from ending my own life