"Worthless"

I had been waiting a year with no support. 1st apt I drove to Liskeard & waited but was forgotten about! Next apt never posted to me! Then I was an given an app at my doc surgery & while I was waiting to book in I went to the loo & the cmht worker left as persumed I wasn't there! Didn't even tell reception! So distressed & let down I felt, no help, total panic so I self harmed. I then rang the head of cmht at trevillis, asked why they didn't look or ask if I'd arrived but was lied to & I told her I hurt myself because of the stress of it but they said "don't be stupid, you didn't self harm because of us!" I was told they would call me back but didn't, horrible service from these people. Another apt arrived for 2wks time & I show them my injury, ask why don't care. They wouldn't discuss it as did an assessment to review my meds. I told them I hide in my bed, cry, nightmares, tremors & social anxiety, panic attacks, low self esteem. I was booked an apt with the phycologist. I visited them at trevillis house there in summer last year, I waited over half hour to see them after my apt time to then have them upset me so much I was shaking as they said they didn't know what to do with me & they would get back to me. Left me in pieces, no tissue, no assurance, just shoved out the door then left alone to then drive back home in a terrible state. I was treated with no respect or dignity at all. I nearly drove into something as I felt helpless. Their report is all wrong, some of it we never even discussed & I do have depression where I hurt myself or shut the world out secure in my bed.bDark thoughts & erratic sleep everyday. I was left alone till I cracked & asked for help as I knew I was struggling. My GP & police asked mental health to contact me. Then 16.40 on 9th Feb 2016 Duty cpn rang as had referral & I understand u don't want to be seen by trevillis am I correct? Me: no because my personnel information was given to my mother when she called without my permission, they put the phone down on me.

I called back asking for their name, I asked their profession & they said cpn. So your a cpn? Very professional of u to put the phone down on me when I'm in crisis ! Their reply was I'm ending the call now & put it down! I felt angry, upset, desperate & had no 1 to help me, it made me self harm as I felt so left alone with horrid thoughts. I did a self referral to Alex house, to be treated the same! I have harmed myself because of the distress from them, tried to take my life & fight the thought everyday. My GP has labelled me & said I'm verbal abusive due to drugs they put me on that made me really ill in my head, I had no support coming off them & went thru mths of hell & feel extremely vulnerable with no support or help, I'm very lonely