"Rapid decline in health due to problems accessing services"

I have always had problems; emotional /interaction with others since I can remember, resulting in seeing various counsellors therapist which I was to complex for since late teens.

I have managed to work in various professions although this has been extremely difficult come home exhausted self harming isolated lack in self care life skills suicidal thoughts and have to change a lot from job to job professions also including working in mental health yet I am constantly left with no support and expectations of remaining strong and helping everyone else.

I have been seeing psychiatrists on/off for many years but always seemed to be discharged and go around in circles.

I was given labels such as bipolar anxiety depression PTSD this was due to sexual assault in 2009 diagnosis 2010. Anxiety depression ongoing. bipolar earlier.

For approximately last 2 years initially via a trip to GP with a very concerned friend who is a s/ worker due to suicidal concerns I was re instated with a team of psychiatrists who all told me how seriously ill I was ( I always went with my advocate due to mistrust and fear of being let go and untreated who can confirm). I was sent to psychology which also coincided with me being asked to leave work due to argument late last year. I have never felt so ill cant pick up actively planning suicide cant see another way.

Yet my psychiatric appointments keep being cancelled after now being also diagnosed with severe and complex personality disorder/HF autism needing meds changed etc. I just give up, the last appointment I had was November 2015 due next February 2016 cancelled to may 2016 spoke to GP who told me to call and get brought nearer I did explained desperate situation they wouldn't/couldn't said I would be put on cancellation list if anything comes before, yet I get further letter yesterday to say they cancelled again until July 2016. My friend is an ex journalist and editor of the local paper was her last job when she returned to our town. I have spoke to her and a the friend who took me to GP first with concerns this time around about telling my story if I don't get around to finishing it myself as I am exhausted I cant keep going like I used to and keep asking for help but no one helps I am now paranoid as I called to bring forward as GP advised and feel they have done this on purpose made it even later its disgusting I have tried so hard to keep well but I am not superwoman and there is no help or they don't want to help. I am going to complain to as many authorities and people as will listen its a disgrace.