"End of Life care"
About: Victoria Hospital / Cardiology Victoria Hospital Cardiology KY2 5AH
Posted by Brojack (as ),
After caring for my father who was in the final stages of heart failure for over 2 years I have been left with the overwhelming feeling that end of life care just depends on what you are dying of.
I experienced first hand the reality and difficulty of putting in place everything possible to make dads final journey as comfortable as possible.
I attended all dads consultant appointments, sat in A & E for hours, discussed with dads own GP any changes to dads condition or new ailments all with dad full consent and appreciation. Home visits for heart nurse, dads own GP even dads dentist became the norm for us.
I was never trying to save dad all I ever wanted was for dads final journey to be as loving cared for and as peaceful as possible not a big ask, as far as I was concerned the very least you can do for another human being.
Dad was clinically depressed and feeling he just did not want to live, kept saying if I knew what to take he would. But he was also scared if he tried this he would end up worse than he was and be more of a burden. I did mention this on one of his many admissions to hosp and ask for someone to speak to him, as far as I know this was never done. His own GP did listen to me one day and put him on medication which helped him so much. He was like the dad I knew more settled in himself and at peace which was all you can ask in anyone's final journey.
Out of this experience I would like something positive to come out of it and perhaps learn something. Dad and I had a long journey and at times I was fighting his corner when he couldn't. we have a tick box system and life doesn't fit into boxes one size does not fit all.
So please if someone is reading this and would like the full story I would be more than happy to relay this either a call, visit whatever, we learn from experience. I was told that dad was lucky to have the family he had and that I was always ten steps in front of arranging anything dad required ie chair lift, carers, etc all that said to me was it shouldn't be down to luck and if I was ten steps in front someone was ten steps behind me.
I want positive to come out of some negative we went through the past few years. Dad appreciated everything that was done for him over many years so much so the he donated his body to medical research.
I couldn't be prouder of him. Contact me if you feel we can help anyone for our experience.