"Poor experience of mental health care in A and E"

I recently presented in A and E after a suicide attempt, self-harm and suicide ideation.

A member of staff came to review me and the first thing they said was-you again. I felt this was degrading and humiliating and I am not proud of my poor mental health and rather ashamed in myself. They added to this shame. I told them that, I don't want to be here and the reply was that they had heard this before for 3 years. And I said - no I've been ill for 3 years but yes I've said I don't want to be here for the last 3 years

They asked me to give them a plan and then I could leave. I didn't want to tell them that my plan as soon as the police released me was to go straight to attempt suicide.  I didn't trust them. I didn't think they would have believed me anyway and I honestly didn't get the impression that they cared.  They wanted me to go home with my husband and they would have my cpn phone me in the morning. I said I didn't want to go home with my husband. I wouldn't be able to kill myself if I did go home with him.

I had told the police I was with that I wanted to go to somewhere for a suicide attempt and I told the member of staff that I didn't want to live any longer.  But I also couldn't tell them about my idea for committing suicide. So I told them I would check into a hotel instead and go for a walk. They left at this point and brought my husband in to see me. I got changed and tried to leave.

The police cuffed me and said they couldn't leave because they knew I was going to go and make a suicide attempt and the staff were not going to have me sectioned. I had a night in a police cell. Worst experience of my life. I got no mental health support. No medication and spent hours trying to hurt myself.

Eventually, the police gave me to my husband who now has me sedated at home and on suicide watch on his own because he is too scared at how badly I want to die. I feel I should have been sectioned. I shouldn't have felt ridiculed and embarrassed by the staff saying -you again when they saw me. I felt they spoke down to me and in a threatening manner.  They showed no care or compassion and even though I told them I didn't want to be here anymore and that I wanted to die. They didn't seem to care.  

I am appalled by their behaviour and the treatment I received. It's now up to my husband to keep me safe from myself. And I have added trauma now to battle.