"Care during and following silent miscarriage"

I experienced a silent miscarriage in August. I was told by a private scan on a Wednesday that I had experienced a silent miscarriage. I tried contacting EPU on the Wednesday evening to leave a message. However, the voicemail service was not available at all. I managed to get through to the voicemail on the Thursday morning I and received a reply late Thursday. I was advised I could not be seen until Monday, as the appointments were full.

I am understanding of the challenges faced by full waiting lists and staff shortages. But this was torture waiting for everything to be confirmed over 4 days. The Doctor at EPU even seemed surprised I had waited for 4 days.

I was advised of my options for management of miscarriage. Given the options and waiting lists at the time I opted for medical management.

I was advised I would be admitted to a ward and medical management would likely take the morning with discharge to home after lunchtime. I was given no written information away with me at this time. This would have been helpful to tell me what to expect and what personal items to bring. It was verbally explained but I will say that after the experience some details appear to be omitted. At the time I did not know if i would be on a 4/6 bedded ward or have an individual room or whether my partner could join me. 

The “few hours on the ward” turned into a full day. I was advised I could have a heat pack to alleviate pain and then advised there were none. Any kind of information leaflet away with me prior would have been helpful at this point, as there were physical things with medication that I wasn’t aware would happen. The nursing staff were very compassionate. But very busy.

I would like to say that my negative experience ends here. However, after my time on the ward I asked what would happen with antenatal appointments scheduled and was advised these would be cancelled. I continued to receive text and phone call reminders for appointments that should have been cancelled. This was really upsetting and it was a very distressing time. I tried chasing this up several times to be told that these appointments were cancelled. I understand technology can be tricky but I really don’t think it’s too much to ask that technology and text reminder services get updated. Or that someone takes responsibility for updating notes or using telephony to someone that can.

Again, I didn’t know what to expect in the time following a miscarriage. The only thing I was really told was that they would send products of conception to pathology and if I had any bad bleeding to phone the ward. I was very fortunate to be lucky that I did not experience that. But I didn’t know whether I should have received pathology results or not. I did most of my own research and found that postpartum symptoms were normal, such as a hormonal migraine (which I’d never had before). 

Managing patient expectations whilst this is going on would have been helpful; some written information; some advise on who to get in touch with. Miscarriage is a completely bewildering and isolating time.

Due to an ovarian cyst, I had a follow up at EPU and this was the most helpful appointment from all of them. The doctor took time to answer all my questions. Prior to conception, I was under the care of ACS. I had asked if I would be put back on their clinics, and the reply was that the doctor would write to them. Whether this happened, I do not know because ACS had no extra information. 

I spoke to ACS myself and had a telephone appointment the following month.

The ACS doctor was unaware I had had a miscarriage at all.

I missed a procedure with ACS due to my pregnancy and the specialist in charge was in contact to see if I was still pregnant/ see if this was still required. The doctor had requested this at my appointment a few days before. Why is there seemingly no record that my baby died?

The lack of communication is quite frankly alarming and upsetting. I feel like I have been a complete oversight and forgotten. This is not patient centred care. I feel frustrated and angry that several months after my miscarriage no one seems to be aware. I need to communicate this at the start of each appointment and go on further waiting lists. This continues now to be a deeply upsetting time. Which could have been avoided now that I am trying to get assisted conception back on track. 

The bottom line is - I didn’t want to post on a forum but I have no where else to turn and I have tried to speak to people involved in my care about this but have reached a dead end. Perhaps there needs to be some changes to the system.