"Accessing mental health services"

I self harmed and called an ambulance. I was seen around 5 hours after being admitted to the hospital. I missed a few of the call outs as I was in the bathroom. If they had knocked, I would’ve come straight out. It was very disappointing. I was in a very bad place mentally and was waiting alone. I hadn’t eaten in a very long time and asked several staff members for food as I had no money or card on me. They didn’t give me anything. I asked multiple times. The water in the waiting area was empty and it stayed that way for at least the duration of my stay in the waiting area.

Eventually when I got treated for my wound I told the doctors and nurses of how I was struggling very badly with depression. I eventually got a bed at heartlands hospital 12 hour after being treated for my wound. It was around 9pm when I got allocated to my bed in the ward. I asked the nurses multiple times for the doctor as I needed help to go sleep. I was given a tablet at 2am, roughly 5 hours after being given my bed. This was the longest I hadn’t slept in my life. It was at least 40 hours that I was awake for. I told the consultant about my excessive drug history, self-harm, suicidal plans. The doctor allowed me the option to voluntarily be discharged. I strongly feel this was the incorrect action as I told them how bad I was struggling, but they allowed me to be discharged less than an hour after our consultation. I was prescribed co-codamol tablets for my knee pain as I had operation a few months prior.

A week later I was in Dudley Road hospital when one of the Doctors said I shouldn’t be have been prescribed co-codamol as my operation was in March 2021. It was August when these incidents occurred. I was originally prescribed dihydrocodeine from my GP on my repeat prescription for the knee pain. I feel that the doctor lacked basic human empathy and compassion. I feel severely let down by the NHS as a whole but specifically that one doctor because they allowed me to voluntarily discharge myself. Also prescribed my co-codamol which another doctor said I shouldn’t be prescribed. I should’ve been prescribed my usual dihydrocodeine tablets. I am currently with The Zinnia Centre who have recently diagnosed me.

I’m waiting to be assessed by CGL (change, grow, live) regarding a detox/rehab. The centre I'm with can’t refer me to counselling. I have to contact my GP myself. My GP will only take appointments if you call from 8:30-9:30am. Whenever I call it’s always busy. When I called them last they said I’d get a call back on the day. I didn’t. So currently, I have one weekly appointment at The Zinnia Centre, where they just increase the dosage of my medication.

I first reported my struggles to the GP in 2016. My mother suffers from schizophrenia for the duration of my life and my father suffers from depression. I have told the doctors this. I need help. I’m not attention seeking. I have struggled for a very long time. It’s ridiculous how poorly managed the NHS is. The hospital should have access to the use of mental health services. I gave permission for the doctors to view my mental health records and medical history.  I feel that lives can be saved if these little tweaks are introduced. I feel really let down as I wait to be helped.