"Early Pregnancy"

I wanted to share my recent experience of the early pregnancy unit. Unfortunately having been referred to EPAS I was told that my pregnancy was most likely not viable however I had to return in a weeks time for confirmation. The person who scanned me at my first two visits was caring and compassionate, they really do deserve recognition for the job they do as having someone like that at a horrible time really does make the world of difference. 

Also during my first visit the registrar discussed my options with me and explained them in detail so I felt very well informed. I was told that I would have the choice of medical or surgical management and that following the confirmation at my next visit I could choose how I wished to proceed.

The following week I returned and spoke with a different registrar. Again the two options were discussed with me and I asked what the timeline would be for both options and this staff member told me that they would go and see how the surgical list was looking. They also stated, “surgical procedures are carried out after any planned c-sections.” In my opinion this isn’t really the best thing to say to someone who has just been told that their pregnancy is not going to continue.

When they returned they informed me that they had spoken to “the boss” and that medical management was the best way to proceed. I asked about the surgical list and was again told that medical management was the preferred course of action. The registrar then stated that this was due to the risks associated with Covid. I explained that I understood the risks but that surgery was my preference. The conversation did continue but I didn’t feel listened to and actually like this particular doctor was in a rush to move on. At this point I felt the choice had been taken away from me and I felt I didn’t have one. The midwife who saw me following this was sympathetic and took the time to listen to me. She was supportive and explained what I needed to know. 

When I returned two days later for medical management I was of course anxious about what was to come. I was placed in a bay to wait and whilst there a couple were brought in to wait for a routine blood test. When the midwife came in to speak me with she said loudly,”I’m sorry you’ve had a miscarriage.” This would have been clearly heard by the couple who were waiting and made me feel very uncomfortable. I signalled to the midwife that there were other people in the room and she asked if I didn’t want her to say anything. I know that midwifes deal with these situations day in day out however for me at that moment I felt upset,vulnerable and I didn’t think it was appropriate that couples who were waiting for a routine test could hear what was going on including how medication was going to be administered. I do need to point out that this midwife was kind but there was a lack of sensitivity. I also understand that it will be a busy ward however it is less than ideal that conversations and the administering of medication in such a sensitive situation is done when other people are in the room. 

I understand that Covid has had a huge impact on the NHS and it’s services however I do not think it is acceptable to be given options on two separate occasions to then be told that I actually didn’t have a choice. My understanding following this is that I could have “pushed” for surgical management but this isn’t something I had the strength for at that time and it should not have to be that way in the first place. 

The staff I have mentioned above did have a positive impact and I am grateful to them for being so caring however overall I was and still am extremely disappointed.