"Disappointing pre-natal and post-natal care"

I recently had my second baby and when I fell pregnant with her I was apprehensive to say the least after receiving pretty poor pre and post natal care in my first pregnancy. Several of my appointments were made incorrectly which was frustrating. My midwife then left but I wasn't informed and wasn't given contact details for another midwife at all so I had no one to contact if I had any concerns other than my local hospital. I saw multiple different midwives in the later stages of my pregnancy meaning there was a lack of consistency in the care I received. My experience in hospital giving birth wasn't great. Whilst I was in labour the care for the most part was ok and I felt well looked after however, the way I was treated afterwards wasn't what I expected. I was taken up to a ward after giving birth late at night and left to get on with it. I struggled to breastfeed and asked for help multiple times but was given very little guidance. When I did get help, the advice was contradicting. I was then told I would not be allowed to leave hospital until I had successfully breastfed despite me saying I would bottle feed if I couldn't breast feed. I felt that the midwives treated me as if bottle feeding wasn't an option and this resulted in me discharging myself simply to ensure that I could actually feed my baby rather than starving her by attempting to breast feed when it wasn't working. 

The whole way through my pregnancy and throughout the antenatal classes and health visitor classes, it seemed like breast feeding was talked about as if it was the only option. I wanted to breastfeed as I understand the benefits however, in my opinion, a fed baby is best, whatever way it is fed. I thought that too much pressure was put on me to breast feed even though it wasn't working. I spoke to a staff member who offered no additional help at all. In the end the only thing that aided in my breast feeding was using nipple shields which we found whilst searching the internet for a breast pump. No one suggested these at all and yet, that was the answer for us. 

Whilst I was in hospital, the staff failed to notice my baby had jaundice (which was caused by the fact I struggled to breastfeed and was discouraged from mixed feeding by the hospital staff). This also went unnoticed by the midwife who visited us the day after we got home and only got picked up when we pointed out the yellowness when we saw the community midwife a few days later.

All of this left me with a very negative feeling which had an impact on how I felt doing into my second pregnancy. I told myself it had to be better than last time, but here I am 2 weeks post birth feeling even more disappointed in the care (or lack of) that I received. 

In the course of this pregnancy I have had 3 different midwives. The paperwork I was given at the start of my pregnancy included a form about my mental health which is supposed to be completed at every appointment. I wasn't asked about my mental health at any of my appointments despite being in tears at one of them. Early in this pregnancy I was suffering with pelvic girdle pain, I was given a leaflet about it and told there was nothing they could do to help. At the appointment I attended on my due date (at which point I was in so much pain I could hardly walk) the midwife (the first time I saw this 3rd midwife) told me I should have been offered physio as soon as I had symptoms. This had never been offered.

I saw a consultant during my pregnancy and at 36 weeks was advised that I would be induced on my due date as they didn't want me to go overdue. When I saw my midwife afterwards mentioned this and was told there was no record of that and that it wouldn't happen. When I saw midwife on my due date (in considerable pain) I was told there was no plan in place for me and therefore I would have to see the consultant again several days later. I then saw the consultant who advised me it was in my notes and that I should have been induced but because the midwives had not noticed this in my notes, there I was at 41 weeks being told there were now no slots to be induced until the following Monday which took me to 41 weeks plus 4.

During all of the above I had multiple appointments that were incorrectly booked including an appointment for a stretch and sweep to happen prior to my induction that they booked for the same day despite telling me it was 2 days before.

Also, at no point during my pregnancy was any birthing plan discussed. I wasn't asked about what pain relief I might want, what kind of birth I wanted or anything about after labour and the options you have for delayed cord clamping etc. I also wasn't asked about any of this when I actually went into labour. The only thing I was asked was about pain relief and I had to repeatedly tell various midwives that I didn't want gas and air as it made me sick. 

My labour experience this time was ok in terms of care. The midwife that delivered the baby was very calming and I felt well looked after however, after giving birth, we were left on the delivery room from the early hours of the morning until we were finally discharged from the delivery suite (after telling them I wanted to go home and not to the ward) at midday. During this time I had been left for around 4 hours before my partner went and asked if I could have a shower and have my blood-soaked bed sheets changed. 

The final straw for me came when I had a text saying I had missed my discharge appointment. I texted my midwife twice asking for confirmation of when my appointment is at, it had been booked for the incorrect surgery and I was told it would be changed. I have had no response.

I would like to say, I understand that midwives have a hard job, however, I feel that there needs to be something put in place to stop these things happening. I had 3 different midwives during my pregnancy due to people leaving but there seemed to be no handover and I wasn't notified of who my new midwife would be until I turned up to my next appointment with them. There was no concern given to mental health despite them knowing I was struggling with pelvic girdle pain and had been messed around after being told I would be induced and ending up with no plan whatsoever.
 

My experiences as I have explained above put me off having any further children. If I did get pregnant, I would not even consider going back to Royal Berks hospital and would instead opt for another hospital. A friend of mine who lives in a neighboring county is pregnant and has had a complete opposite experience in care. I can only assume this is because her care is provided by a different NHS trust. This just shows there is a lack of consistency in care provided across different areas.