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"End of life care"

About: ICST (Community Nursing, Physiotherapy, Occupational Therapy) / ICST (Community Nursing, Physiotherapy, Occupational Therapy) Hamilton Udston Hospital University Hospital Hairmyres / Medical/Gastroenterology (Ward 11) University Hospital Hairmyres / Surgical Receiving Unit (Ward 4) University Hospital Monklands / Chemotherapy Day Unit (Ward 15) University Hospital Monklands / Emergency Department University Hospital Monklands / General Surgery (Ward 4)

(as a relative),

My wonderful Dad was diagnosed with non Hodgkins lymphoma in November 2024. The doctor we saw was blunt, rude and arrogant, we were initially told he was palliative and there was nothing they could do, despite not having had a biopsy etc. I spoke with another doctor, who was so lovely, reassuring and helpful, advising once a biopsy was done they’d be able to offer treatment all being well.

Ward 3 staff were nice, but one doctor was anything but. Mocking patients who mispronounced medical terminology is not professional. We found this doctor lacking in compassion and care. Their attitude changed when they were with senior medical staff however, and their whole demeanour was completely different.

We then waited 5 days in another ward. One member of staff was amazing- thank you. Dad waited for a biopsy then he was discharged home to await the results with a follow-up appointment at Monklands. About a week later we had to call an ambulance as Dad became really ill, the lymphoma was causing him terrible pain and he was septic. So we were taken to UHM A&E and the care given was exceptional, despite a fire evacuation staff remained calm, professional and prioritised my dad's care, ensuring regular pain relief was given and he was transferred to ward 4.

Most of the staff were amazing, but when one member of staff was on duty the second day, we had just found out he had lymphoma and the medics were discussing treatment options etc so we were all very stressed, upset and keen to help Dad through the next few days. So when this member of staff  was rude, dismissive and completely obnoxious it was awful. They came in, changed over the IV (without washing their hands, telling Dad what they were doing, acknowledge him or his family) I was really angered and upset. My Dad, who was a bit confused and tired due to infection then introduced his wife and daughter, as he liked to chat and express his pride. Without even looking, they bluntly said - we’ve heard this all day, right, that’s you, and walked out the room. My Dad’s wee face will stay in my mind forever. Everyone else had been and was amazing since, but their attitude was nothing less than disturbing. To treat an elderly, confused yet polite, grateful patient, who has just been told he has cancer in this manner is disgusting. The atmosphere in the ward was totally different with their presence and my sister actually called the ward two days later to speak to them. They blamed pressure on the ward etc for their behaviour.

However, ward 11 and ward 15 - how caring is done right. After 6 rounds of chemo he was pronounced cancer free in May. After a short period he declined and it became apparent things were not ok and he was admitted to Monklands A&E and advised lymphoma was present. He had more chemo and was cared for by ward 15 who were absolutely amazing. They were exemplary in how to treat patients and relatives and one member of staff in particular was so kind and helpful. It was never a nuisance for us to call at any time and visits were welcomed with genuine warmth. My Dad has always praised staff throughout his treatments and stays and knew everyone’s names. Thank you for your care, compassion and dedication.

Finally. District nursing team from Udston were also just wonderful. We were so anxious when it was time to withdraw treatment and I really wanted to care for Dad at home. The care and regular call-outs to keep Dad comfortable seemed effortless. Your compassion and skill and care for not only dad but our family eased the terrible pain and we trusted in you all to make things go well, keeping him pain free and comfortable You are a credit to our NHS. Thank you for your care and going the extra mile for us, forever grateful.

Two staff members arrived just as Dad passed and their last offices will be remembered forever. The gentle care and professionalism, you left us better for that alone. We are forever grateful and please know your kindness will come back to you all. Thank you. My Dad was always so grateful and proud of our NHS and especially those who care. He told everyone who cared to listen. God bless.

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Responses

Response from Carmen Obre, Service Manager, Hamilton Locality, South Lanarkshire University Health and Social Care Partnership 3 weeks ago
Carmen Obre
Service Manager, Hamilton Locality,
South Lanarkshire University Health and Social Care Partnership
Submitted on 22/10/2025 at 17:49
Published on Care Opinion at 17:49


Millie M, thank you so much for sharing this deeply personal and heartfelt account of your Dad’s journey within care opinion. I’m truly sorry for the pain and distress your family has endured, especially during such a vulnerable and emotional time. Your words reflect not only the immense love and pride you have for your Dad and it’s clear that while many staff provided exceptional care—bringing comfort, dignity, and kindness—there were moments that fell far short of what anyone should experience, especially in the NHS Lanarkshire where compassion is at the heart of care. The contrast between the exemplary and the unacceptable is stark, and your reflections are powerful in highlighting both.

Your gratitude toward the teams in Ward 11, Ward 15, A&E, and the Udston district nurses is beautifully expressed. It’s moving to hear how their professionalism and humanity made such a difference, especially in your Dad’s final days. The way you describe their care—gentle, respectful, and deeply human—is a testament to the best of what healthcare can be.

If you’re considering sharing this feedback formally with NHS Lanarkshire to raise concerns about the negative experiences I would suggest contacting

Patient Affairs department

Patientaffairs.Monklands@lanarkshire.scot.nhs.uk

tel 01698752800

regards

Carmen

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Response from Mhairi Simpson, Nurse Consultant, University Hospital Monklands, NHS Lanarkshire 2 weeks ago
Mhairi Simpson
Nurse Consultant, University Hospital Monklands,
NHS Lanarkshire

I am the professional lead for cancer nursing and a member of the cancer care management team.

Submitted on 28/10/2025 at 17:18
Published on Care Opinion at 17:18


picture of Mhairi Simpson

Dear MillieM

I would like to echo what Carmen has said. I will ensure that your feedback is shared with the staff in wards 11 and 15.

thank you

Mhairi

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Response from Lise Axford, Chief of Nursing, University Hospital Hairmyres, NHS Lanarkshire last week
Lise Axford
Chief of Nursing, University Hospital Hairmyres,
NHS Lanarkshire
Submitted on 10/11/2025 at 12:18
Published on Care Opinion at 12:18


picture of Lise Axford

Dear MillieM

Thank you for taking the time to share your father’s care journey with us on Care Opinion. First and foremost, please accept my deepest condolences on the loss of your Dad. Your words reflect the deep love and pride you had for him, and I am truly sorry for your loss.

Your feedback is incredibly valuable and has been shared with the relevant teams across our hospitals and community services. I want to sincerely thank you for highlighting the many staff members who provided compassionate, professional, and person-centred care throughout your father’s diagnosis, treatment, and final days. It is heartening to hear that teams in Ward 11, Ward 15, A&E at University Hospital Monklands, and the Udston District Nursing team made such a positive difference to your family. As colleagues have said, your kind words will be passed on to those involved—they will be deeply appreciated.

At the same time, I am very sorry to hear about the distressing experiences you and your father encountered during parts of his care. The behaviours you described—particularly around communication, professionalism, and compassion—fall short of the standards we expect from our staff. It is especially upsetting to hear how your father was treated during such a vulnerable time. Please be assured that this feedback will be taken seriously and used as a learning opportunity to reinforce the importance of dignity, empathy, and respect in every interaction.

We are committed to ensuring that every patient and family receives the highest standard of care, and your story will help us reflect on where we must do better. If you would be willing to speak further, we would welcome the opportunity to listen and learn more from your experience.

Thank you again for your honesty, your praise, and your trust in sharing such a personal journey. Your father’s pride in the NHS and in those who cared for him is a powerful reminder of why we do what we do.

Kindest regards

Lise

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