"There did not seem to be empathy or compassion"

Many times my son had been through the department as he had Crohn’s disease for 3 years and then cancer for over 6. Most of these times he received good care and adequate pain relief but not this time. He had many hospitalisations in the past and had a colostomy and urostomy, also had tolerated 29 chemos, he was no stranger to suffering and endurance. At the time of admission he was on a trial drug from the Christie Hospital in Manchester. Throughout all of this he remained positive, optimistic, did not complain and wanted to use his experiences to make life better for others. Up until a few weeks prior to this he had been living a full life, enjoying going to football matches in Manchester and working part-time.

My son worked in a support role for cancer patients and had always a desire and a heart to help those who were suffering giving them the care, dignity and respect he thought they deserved. Sadly the care that he received that day fell short of what we feel he, or anyone deserved. We his family feel this account has to be heard on his behalf even though it’s now several weeks since he died. He wanted us to highlight the need for cancer patients to be listened to, their pain taken seriously and thought it important that they would be treated with dignity and empathy.

My son was very unwell that day, in pain and vomiting having just finished a course of radiotherapy. He had been on strong pain relief - morphine, pregabalin and oramorph prescribed by the hospice community nurse and palliative team. He had brought this pain relief up through vomiting when he entered A&E and therefore wasn’t getting any benefit from it. This didn’t seem to be taken into account.

On assessment the vomiting and pain were not addressed and he was given a sick bowl and asked to wait. Usually these things would have been seen as a priority of care. Staff we saw did seem preoccupied with getting encompass dealt with as far as blood labels etc were concerned, there did not seem to be empathy or compassion for his needs and an apparent indifference to his pain.

After a while he did get IV paracetamol which did not reduce his pain but was told just wait till it works. No reassessment or discussion about something else needed. Both my son and myself were so distressed we were both crying. This is something he has never done since his cancer diagnosis in 2019. It was a horrible time for us both and traumatic still for me to this day.

All day he suffered in pain moving about to try and get relief with no-one seemingly able, or willing to help him or deal with his pain. Several times I mentioned that he needed something but there was always seemed to be some excuse. It really did seem that staff we saw did not believe he was in pain at all despite his cancer history.

It wasn’t until the evening of that day that another staff member came and prescribed the adequate pain relief that was needed.

Surely all patients, not just cancer patients deserve better care than this?

We both felt that his time in A&E could have been much better regarding the following:-

*If my son’s pain had been assessed properly, even if IV paracetamol was given it didn’t work and his pain levels should have been reassessed. Also he was vomiting in triage and just given sick bowls and sent to wait in the waiting area. We worry about the plight of other cancer, or indeed any patient in pain coming into the department. Surely there has to be a better pathway from assessment.

*Both of us feel we weren’t listened to. He already had been on heavy pain relieving medications and thought to be given basic pain relief was totally inadequate.

*Myself and my son were both so distressed and no one seemed to have empathy or compassion for us. It really did seem that more attention was given to the computer and filling in the encompass system than to his comfort and care.

*This was one of my son’s last days and we feel that to be given such care doesn’t maintain dignity or engender confidence in care provided by the trust.

What was good?

The staff member who came at the end of the long day and prescribed adequate pain relief and talked to my son as well as listened to what he was going through.

What can be improved?

Admission and assessment of patients particularly cancer patients in pain and at the end of life.

There needs to be some staff able to assess and meet the needs of cancer patients.

All patients need to be listened to and treated with empathy and compassion.

Easing pain needs to be a priority for all patients.

As a mum, to have a son with a terminal diagnosis is bad enough but to see him in such pain and being treated in such a way makes everything so much worse, needlessly.

Most of all the issues we faced that day can be improved without any financial cost. It’s the human touch and value of respect, dignity, empathy and compassion that mostly needs to be improved.