"First birth - hospital visit and home birth"

This was my first pregnancy so have been learning as I go. I was first with the normal clinic midwifery team and then transferred to the Homebirth team. This was precipitated by an appointment where a midwife decided to book me in for all my appointments from 20 weeks to birth and pronounced they’d  book me in for a sweep at 40+3 to get that baby out - I was so taken aback by the lack of consultation about my preferences that I shut down, agreed to it and internally panicked. I didn’t want to be induced in any form but without having done any of this before, I lost my voice and didn't feel I could contest this, so just let it get booked. I was already apprehensive about a hospital birth given the number of stories I'd heard about women having largely unnecessary interventions or intervention without being given all the information. After this appointment I could see how this happens and so investigated the Homebirth team. 

The Homebirth team were immediately amazing. My care was more consistent, I felt I was provided with all the evidence for each decision in a more open ended way and there were no assumptions about the choices I would make. The open session where we learnt about the experiences of different families was really helpful for us and I became really excited about my home birth choice. 

When I went into labour I didn’t really quite realise I still had to go into the QE, to show my maternity pads and confirm that my waters had broken with no meconium. It turns out it just depends on who you speak to at maternity assessment which seems a bit arbitrary. It wasn’t easy to get to the hospital and once there we just had to sit in the waiting room with loud music, bright lights and strangers, whilst I was experiencing quite intense contractions. Finally we said we were just going to go home - I was having very regular contractions that were getting more intense, it was obvious I was in labour and it wasn’t really possible to just keep sitting in those chairs. The team checked my pads, blood pressure and we left. 

I called for the home team midwife at 9pm - 4 hours after going into labour. At this point there wasn’t really a break between my contractions and I was starting to really struggle. I largely felt fobbed off by maternity assessment and told that as this was my first labour I should wait it out as I would be in labour for ages. I called back two hours later  demanding my midwife. They arrived in 10 mins, checked me and I was at 7cm. I had done this with no analgesic and actually, had I been listened to the first time I called, I would have been able to receive the support I needed.

As it was, by the time the gas and air was brought out, it was too late and didn’t really touch the sides, so I proceeded with the rest of my birth with no pain relief at all. Maternity assessment just kept saying call back once you have 3 contractions >60 seconds in duration in 10 mins, but as soon as my waters broke that was where I started and no matter how many times I said this, it wasn’t heard.

I was also told (not asked) several times, that as I was coping I should wait - you choose a Homebirth knowing things like epidurals etc are off the cards so have other coping mechanisms in place. And importantly, surely the point is not that I should wait until I am not coping, to try and claw it back. This was basically what happened and it is entirely due to maternity triage not listening. It might have been my first labour, but surely I know what my body is doing better than anyone, and just because most first labours normally take longer doesn’t mean all do - and mine certainly didn’t. 

Overall, my experience with the Homebirth team was 10/10, but I felt that whilst the hospital-based team are lovely, they do not listen, and this has a distinct, negative impact on my birthing experience.