"A head on collision"

A van overtook cars and came towards me crashing head on with a combined impact of 80 mph. I thought I was going to die as all the airbags went off and I could see smoke so I punctured the airbag and could see my foot was badly injured as the bone was sticking out. I feared the car would go on fire so I scrambled out of the car to a grass verge and emergency services were called by passers by.

I was taken to resus in A&E and had ketamine to reposition my foot for surgery the following day which was horrific as I believe I was dying at the time.

Since the accident the other driver told lies about it being fully his fault although he was banned from driving for twelve months and has never shown remorse for what happened. This still upsets me greatly and my fear of being in a car is extreme to the point that I only travelled for essential appointments.

I have vivid flashbacks daily and struggle to go to sleep and to stay asleep as every time I close my eyes the accident replays as if it’s actually happening. With the flashbacks and nightmares I am in a complete panicked state feeling hot and finding it hard to breathe with my heart racing like it’s going to burst. It’s so real and feels like I’m right back at the accident and so frightening and it’s difficult to ever imagine these flashbacks and nightmare will ever cease or lesson.

I’ve just finished 20 sessions of cbd counselling and although I was very sceptical before and also during the first few sessions I decided I had nothing to lose and now can see some light that I have some control of my life now and for the future. It made me realise it’s ok to have feelings of anger and despair and also fear but that I’m stronger than I give myself credit for and hope that although my life changing injuries are hard to accept that I can try to continue living the best life possible by the coping strategies I learned and I’m very thankful for this and would recommend anybody to give it a go and you won’t regret it.