"Long awaited surgery"

I attended crosshouse hospital early March to receive surgery for a hysterectomy, +- bowel resection which I had been waiting in pain for around 3+ years. From the admission to the day surgery unit to the transfer to the gynaecology ward, I have absolutely nothing else to express but praise. Every nursing assistant, nurse, surgeon and anaesthetist treated me with kindness and respect. As a nurse of 12 years there nothing more daunting than knowing a little too much. However despite an issue with pain in recovery everyone had a heart of gold and when settled in the recovery area managed a little laugh with the staff who made me feel like I was in safe hands.

Upon transfer to the ward I met staff nurse Ainsley and her lovely student nurse who made me comfortable before having to leave for shift change. I was given patient controlled analgesia and still drowsy from the 4.5 hour surgery, thought I’d manage a good sleep and be on the road to recovery in no time.

Thats when things changed drastically, I was met with probably the worst staff member I have ever encountered in my career and life. 

Their name etched in my memory forever for making me realise that not all have compassion and patience. Throughout the night I was in extreme pain which I had expressed to them at many of their routine checks and was informed by them to just press the button which I relied on heavily. This wasn’t ’just’ a hysterectomy, it had taken surgeons 4+ hours to separate my internal organs, I was told by my surgeon that this was an extremely complex surgery, and I are going to be very sore and uncomfortable for a while, but I knew the power of less stronger analgesia and was keen to rely more on this. 

I was informed by the staff member that they would sneak in over night and try not to disturb me to carry out their observations and I should just sleep. In my interactions I was pleasant, I was patient and I was scared, I hadn’t felt pain like this before in my life. I’d never used Patient controlled analgesia. But I knew it was getting around the time where I could have regular paracetamol and ibuprofen which really helped in recovery, when I kindly asked for this I was informed - it’s not prescribed, just press the medication button I could tell very quickly that reassurance and understanding were NOT on offer throughout the staff member in question. I was made to feel like a pest.

I was unable to sleep, but my light was turned off, I was told to go to sleep. I had no access to a buzzer, (which I hadn’t used at all, waiting only for my regular checks to chat with the staff member). It was hanging down by the wall out of my reach; I did try at one point but couldn’t manage to reach it. I had also requested this to be placed beside me and was ignored. 

I’m not sure how often observations are checked post surgery as my background is acute nursing but I was aware that these may have been falsified as they weren’t completed correctly but witnessed the news chart being filled in. I was drowsy and had a lot of morphine however I can remember everything exactly as it was. 

At one check the staff member was horrified to find my PCA was nearly finished, I was then met with judgment and embarrassment with comments such that they need to change it as I've nearly used it all, ‘that I've used so much, despite being refused regular medications and told to continue to press the button. 

I cried. I felt alone and scared and wanted to call family. I didn’t sleep a wink. My catheter was removed at 5am and I got my buzzer in the end. I was given this at 0630. It was placed in my hand and was then met with a glimmer of compassion, there you can reach it now.

Before leaving my room for the last time I was informed, that hopefully I’ll get home today and they won’t have to see me again. I asked them to repeat themselves incase I had misheard but no they repeated the exact same words before leaving with a smile and skip in their step. 

I burst out crying and expressed how difficult my night had been and how uncomfortable I had been without any kindness or compassion shown. Sadly I’m having to write this now because of the bad experience and often the good goes unheard however It’s taken me a while to get over this experience and only now feel strong enough to express how I was made to feel. By one staff member! Only one, but I won’t ever forget how I was made to feel at my most vulnerable time. 

I’d like to end this on a positive and again thank every member of staff for the compassion, kindness and patience I was shown. Everyone going above and beyond under extremely challenging times.

I urge the charge nurse of this ward to contact me to discuss further if she so wishes.