"Neonatal Stay"

We welcomed our baby boy at 33 weeks and 5 days and although he did not need any immediate support, due to his gestation he was taken to neonatal care.

After a flying start and being told we would have him upstairs on the maternity ward in a few days that all unfortunately changed. After a few days of uncertainty and being told rather than included in decision makings regarding our son we felt completely and utterly defeated. That mixed with postnatal hormones and being told 4-5 different things depending on who was speaking did not get our family off to a start we had envisioned. 

While we know every single person in the neonatal ward has care at the forefront sometimes this was more a clinical approach rather than a compassionate or common sense one, and while yes that is probably needed in a majority of cases for very sick early babies it just felt difficult as our little boy was medically well and it was just his feeding that needed regulated.

We were coming from a maternal end and going along with what we felt was right and what we had learned through our antenatal classes, which didn’t correspond with what we were being told in neonatal. We did query this and were told that the antenatal classes don’t incorporate neonatal as only 5% of babies end up in neonatal…. We were in that 5%. Personally I think 1% is enough to incorporate it.

Fast forward to day 4 in neonatal and we had Elaine with our son, an absolute turning point for us as parents and for our son. I felt at ease speaking to Elaine, as she listened to me as a mum. I told her what I needed and she gave me options and for the first time I felt in control of my son’s care…essentially I felt like a mum for the first time. Her care, compassion and common sense was unbelievable and thoroughly welcomed. After having a great day with her, we became slightly anxious for shift change as we didn’t sit with our son throughout the night, we needn’t have worried as in walked Donal, an absolute breath of fresh air. We were able to laugh and felt again at ease straight away. Again his care, compassion and common sense shone through for our son. Between both Elaine and Donal our son has consistent care for three/four days/nights, that we had an input in, and because of them we had a major turning point and felt that there was finally light at the end of the tunnel.

Our son made great progress with little bumps instead of huge hurdles. 

We will be forever grateful and thankful to the neonatal team but even more so to Elaine and Donal.