"Broken by the NHS"

In 2023 my GP referred me to Orthopaedics for a knee replacement and I have been on the waiting list since. I was offered a short notice cancellation appointment last month at the New Victoria Hospital Glasgow. This was a truly horrid experience which has left me feeling emotionally rejected and it is only now I am feel strong enough to put pen to paper to share the treatment I was subjected to.

I attended the appointment full of hope and expectation, optimistic that I would not have long to wait for surgery and taking the first step to getting my life back. On the day of the appointment, it transpired that I was to be assessed by advanced practice physiotherapist whose role it was to decide whether I was clinically debilitated enough to be deserving of an operation or if I could be placed back on the waiting list.

Nothing could have prepared me for the belittling and condescending manner I faced during this appointment. This person did not seem in the least interested to hear about my clinical picture leading up to the appointment. I tried to explain about the challenges, following my breast cancer treatment a few years earlier, which impact on my ability to take analgesia to manage pain, however it seemed clear they were not interested.

Their first words were to tell me I hadn’t seen my GP since I was referred. I tried to explain that I attend my GP regularly for follow-up care for breast cancer and my parathyroid condition and, at each appointment, I discuss the difficulties with mobility due to the crippling pain in my knees, but I was dismissed with no acknowledgment of anything I said. I was shut down as quickly as possible, being told, if you are still managing to work, you have not reached a catastrophic stage yet. I was then sent for a series of weightbearing x-rays.

I then tried to explain about my limitations in the workplace and describe the significant adaptations my employer has made to allow me to continue working, but they did not even look towards me or acknowledge that I had spoken. I tried to mention the difficulties walking upstairs and the bouts of pain when my knees buckle, the impact on my sleep, but there was a complete lack of empathy, they continually talked over me. It made me feel insignificant, unworthy and that I had no voice.

I know that I am at the end of my rope and cannot go on enduring the pain, but I realised that anything I said was falling in deaf ears, I felt I had nowhere to go for help and I felt like crying. I wanted to leave the consultation before I broke down in tears.

Before I left, they summarised by saying I was still managing to work and drive, therefore my condition was not at a catastrophic stage, and I would be called back in the future for further assessment. Their parting words were to tell me perhaps I could try to lose some weight before I come back.

The immediate days after the appointment, I felt devastation, I was physically and emotionally broken, with all the hope extinguished. My knees were worse than ever because of the positions I had to get into for the weightbearing x-rays. I was unable to attend my place of work.

It is now several weeks since I attended the NVH, and I am still very emotional whenever I think about this humiliating and condescending experience. My manager has referred me for staff counselling to help with my mental wellbeing following this appointment. My husband and children can see the impact that this experience has had on my confidence.

In the past, I have only had positive experiences in the NHS for myself and my family, but this is, unfortunately, the one at the forefront of my mind at any mention of the NHS