"Bereavement support following Death of Children"

The death of my children and subsequent grief was very complicated. Life has been changed forever and the place of a father in society without children is a hard, lonely place to be. Especially as you are supporting your partner who deals with things in a different way.

Jen has supported me through the varying stages of grief including helping to get over anger. However the most important aspect has been providing me a safe space to speak and talking to me which enabled me to open my perspective, think of things in different ways and ultimately challenge myself. Having the space to be challenged on my thoughts and what I should do about them in a judgement free environment cannot be underestimated, especially when you are already in a vulnerable space yourself. It is hard for men to sometimes open and speak truthfully about how they feel and work through issues. This is especially true when having thoughts surrounding anger, struggling with the differences of how your partner is approaching things or feeling guilty. These are the feelings that eat away at you from the inside. 

The support was further needed when both my mother and my dog also passed away before their time. All were different scenarios, different feelings of grief and very different to process. I also had the very general but difficult feeling of why me? and when can I just catch break? Although sweeping statements these elements do need to be broken down and spoken about as again after multiple traumatic deaths in the family, the feelings were completely justified. It's then how we respond to them and what we want to do with these feelings where the support comes in.

I can't thank Jen enough for providing the service over the past 2 years and supporting me through the most difficult and darkest of times.