"I can't get clear answers or proactive care"

I'm 8 weeks pregnant with a history of recurrent miscarriages (6 of them) and thyroid issues, and I'm deeply concerned about the care I'm receiving from both the NHS and private sectors.

At 6 weeks, I saw my GP, explained my history of miscarriages and thyroid problems, and asked for an early scan. They refused, saying I'd only get one if I was actively bleeding. A few days later, when I had some bleeding and returned, they demanded to check my sanitary pad (which I thought was highly inappropriate). Even though the bleeding had stopped, they finally booked me for an EPU scan.

At the EPU, despite seeing a heartbeat and hearing my history, they initially refused a follow-up scan. I had to insist they speak to a manager before they reluctantly agreed to book one.

The midwifery department, when I called to book an appointment, said I should definitely be under closer monitoring with endocrinology and consultant care given my history. Yet, I'm still waiting for these referrals.

I had to push my GP to even give me a thyroid blood test. My first miscarriage at 9 weeks was due to severely undetected overactive thyroid, yet they insist I wait until I've seen the midwife (a week from now, followed by a week's holiday) before referring me to endocrinology and a consultant. Of course, another two or three week wait can be the difference between a miscarriage and not. 

To complement my NHS care, I've also been seeing a private fertility clinic. They've prescribed intralipids and steroids, insisting on fortnightly visits costing large amounts of money. However, when I've tried to discuss this private care with NHS providers or present information from my private doctors, the NHS staff seem annoyed and, I feel, almost treat me worse. While I understand they won't take orders from private doctors, it shouldn't mean I get lesser NHS care because I've decided to seek additional support.

I feel caught between two systems, neither of which seems to be providing the comprehensive care I need. The private clinic seems more focused on expensive treatments and scans, while the NHS appears reluctant to provide the monitoring my situation requires. I'm left feeling that I have to fight for appropriate care on both fronts.

No one seems to be taking my health concerns seriously, and I'm constantly googling for information because I can't get clear answers or proactive care from healthcare providers. I feel like I'm constantly fighting for basic care and monitoring.

Am I being unreasonable to expect more comprehensive and responsive treatment from both the NHS and private healthcare, given my high-risk status? Should I have to fight this hard for appropriate care? And should accessing private care negatively impact the quality of NHS care I receive?

The whole experience has left me feeling anxious, and unable to trust anyone. I just want to have a healthy baby - which seems to be my priority and no one else’s currently.