"Awkward, painful pelvic exam"

I left Irvine's gynaecology department yesterday feeling despondent, belittled and worst of all, manhandled. 

The doctor asked very little in terms of background information or even symptoms. Very early in the appointment, they decided to prescribe medication for heavy blood flow and started talking to me in great depth about the importance of not allowing myself to be constipated as, in their experience, this is a very likely cause of pelvic pain.

Heavy flow is not the issue I was referred for, or even something that I have complained of, and if the doctor had asked or given me the opportunity to speak, they would have known that I have no issues with constipation - quite the opposite. 

Next came the actual exam, not my first but certainly the most uncomfortable I've experienced. The doctor told me to go behind the curtain and cover myself and went to leave the room. I called out and asked how they needed my clothing to be and they told me to simply undo my trousers and uncover the waist.

The doctor returned and brought a nurse. It quickly became clear that the position of my trousers wasn't going to work and the doctor pulled them down. As the doctor struggled with my trousers I offered to remove my shoes and take down my trousers myself but was told it's fine as the doctor continued to pull at my clothing. I would have felt much more comfortable making the adjustments myself, as I'm sure most grown women would have done. 

The pelvic exam was rough and painful, with very little communication. Night and day compared to the level of care shown by my GP performing the same exam two weeks earlier. 

The follow up conversation was patronising, and the pain I'd experienced was all but entirely dismissed. I've had pain in my left ovary for several years, increasing to the point where I can no longer be intimate with my partner. But according to the doctor, the right side was the more painful (at no point was I asked where or how much pain was experienced during the exam this was entirely their assessment). This was dismissed as my body being confused and referring the pain elsewhere all these years. Silly me.

Throughout the appointment I felt ignored and belittled and went home in a great deal of pain- on the left, where it has always been. There is still discomfort this morning.

It's a small complaint but I wasn't even offered anything to clean up the gel which was between and down my legs, leaving me to sit in the cold and damp of it as we talked.

I've had mixed experiences seeking help for gynaecological issues over the years. Assumptions and generalisations aren't helpful and a little bit of consideration for the vulnerability of your patients goes a long way. 

I really hope my experience was a one off and not what other women have experienced. As for me, I'll be going back to my GP to discuss alternatives as there's no way I'd feel comfortable returning to this professional again.