"My total knee replacement - a poem"

I was looking forward to my operation and was excited the day before I was admitted.

From being admitted onto the ward at 7.30 am I was immediately attended by nursing staff who checked and double checked my details. I was visited by the surgeon, his assistant, and the anesthetist also. I was looked after and monitored all the time before, during, and after the operation.

Everything went well due to the skill of everyone involved. After the op I was moved onto the recovery ward and given a cup of tea, which was very much appreciated.

A while later I was on ward B5 where I was still closely monitored, and cared for by the doctor, nursing staff and tea lady. Even the cleaning staff were on hand constantly keeping the place clean and tidy. I was in hospital 3 days recovering and well looked after all the time.

Here is a poem I wrote:

My New Knee

An exciting day for me

In hospital at the crack of dawn

maybe not to some

but it was early morn

Fifty years a damaged knee

Now so tattered and torn.

Filling forms and boxes ticked

surgeon, his assistant, and more

came to see me on the ward

taking details, not long before

nurses in fresh clean uniforms

anaesthetists ready at the door.

The surgeon’s assistant visits

he says I cannot see

I ask the surgeon also

he says, it's not for me

disappointing, I thought, but still

I'll make do with what must be.

Injection in the spine

minutes later I'm all numb

everywhere from waist down,

I can't feel my bum

excitement fills me up

masochistic or just dumb?

The surgeon under way

the screen is up, worst luck

a big green screen,a sheet

neatly hanging from some hooks

I'm all relaxed, I don't know why

I thought I'd come unstuck.

Drilling, banging, and buzzing

I wonder, should I take a peak

I'll lift the screen an inch or two

just a quiet little sneak.

hold on somethings amiss

fixed down, I think, tongue-in-cheek.

The blaggard has taped it down

from the other side how sly

he must have sussed me out.

but it was worth a try

oh well, not to worry

I give a little sigh.

I leave him to his skill

and before long, job done

I did enjoy the ride

from such a skilful one

I'm glad I got the chance

now recovery has begun.

On to the ward I go

nurses taking up the helm

the care I've had so far

I'm rather overwhelmed

settled in and cup of tea

what's the name of this hotel?

anaesthetics wearing off

about 3 hours or so

then out of bed an up

on to my feet I go

the pain, the agony, the hurt

shuffling around so slow.

They say it's for the best

physios attend to my new knee

oh the pain, I can't bare

please girls, leave me be

next time I'll find somewhere to hide

I'll go and have a wee.

All in all though I must stress

the care I had was the best

anaesthetist, surgeon, and the team

nurses, cleaners, and the rest

the most you could expect

better than a hotel guest.

True heroes of our time

I hope they get their desire

whatever their rewards

It needs to be much hire

dedication, care, and love

we always should admire.