"A story of baby loss and wonderful compassion"

Recently my husband and I found ourselves facing our worst possible nightmare. The loss of our beautiful baby boy at 21 weeks old which is still very raw.

And although our grief is still very fresh, we felt it was important to write a positive review of our experience; because it takes truly special people to be able to care for you in your darkest moments and yet leave you with nothing but gratitude and appreciation for all the care, kindness, compassion and empathy you received.

Every member of staff we encountered during our journey was simply wonderful and we are so grateful for the NHS but more importantly for the NHS staff that go above and beyond every day. It really is true that the NHS runs on goodwill but we are so appreciative for that goodwill.

Karis (sonographer) and Wendy (screening midwife) from the scanning department delivered us the worst possible news imaginable that would turn our worlds upside down, and yet they did so with so much compassion and empathy. In situations like this, verbal and non-verbal communication is so important and we cannot thank both of them enough for their expertise, gentle voices and their careful choice of words.

Wendy went over and above to try and ensure we could see a consultant that day despite it being short staffed and Dr Scott came out of running another clinic to spend time with us and to give us further information and answer any questions we may have. We will always be grateful to her for coming to speak to us, not making us feel rushed and allowing us time to process all the information we were given (despite presumably running very behind in her clinic).

Then we found ourselves on Rubislaw Ward... The last place any parent wants to find themselves. Every single member of staff we encountered was kind, compassionate and empathetic. The day we were admitted they were extremely busy and short staffed, but you wouldn’t have been able to tell.

We felt well informed of what to expect, well taken care of and in safe hands. Nothing was too much to ask and everything was done in our own time. We want to say a massive thank you to Coral, Ali, Andrea, Megan and Katie for everything they did for us over our 2 days on the ward. They made the worst days of our lives that little bit easier and we will forever be grateful. They all went above and beyond and Coral and Andrea even stayed late on their shifts to ensure we were ok before leaving. 

We also want to acknowledge the amazing work, kindness and compassion we received from the domestic Anna too, who played her own special part in our journey.

Sadly, I also ended up in theatre overnight for retained placenta. The theatre team were absolutely amazing and really put me at ease when I was super anxious. From the friendly male anaesthetist (sorry I did not catch your name, but you wore glasses and you were super jolly and kind), to the lovely friendly theatre nurses Christie and Andrea /Adrienne who eased my nerves with their kindness and by letting me grip their hands tight as I was being put to sleep, I will never forget how well cared for I felt and I will be forever grateful.

We also encountered 3 of the registrars from Rubislaw Ward between the surgery and having to go back to Rubislaw for a check-up two weeks later and they were all so kind, experienced and wonderful too.

Despite this being the worst time of our lives, we will forever be grateful to every member of staff that took care of us and our beautiful angel son and we want them all to know how amazing they are and the difference that they make to the people that they care for. It may be part of their job that they do every day but to maintain that level of teamwork, dedication, empathy and compassion is truly special.