"Medical professionals have to listen to what families are saying"

Mum was admitted to A&E as had fallen and had been sick with bleed. She also has quite advanced vascular dementia but stays in own home with care. Ambulanced in - the crew were fantastic and showed a lot of care and empathy.  Had to wait outside A&E for approx 3 hours then go in to A&E. 

She was discharged after a few hours with antibiotics.  My sister and niece struggled to get her into car in the A&E car park due to her lack of mobility and sore back.  It was dark, cold and freezing.  A passer-by had to help them and couldn't.  They went back into A&E to ask for help but were told, they are very busy from the receptionist.  A paramedic noticed them struggling and couldn't seem to believe they had been left to try to get mum into the car - they managed to do this.  They then struggled late at night to get her into her own house and thought she would collapse in the front garden. This was all captured on CCTV.  Even when in the house she was struggling to be helped by 2 of them to get to her bed.  

Day later, carer went in to find she had been very sick (again blood in sickness) and phoned ambulance.  We asked that she wasn't taken to A&E again due to failed discharge and poor standard of care received last time (no empathy at all from the A&E staff). The paramedics again were extremely good with my mum and showed great care and empathy.  They took time to phone and get her into Acute Medical Assessment ward. 

Once in there she was transferred to 102.  Again received good care and as a family we felt total relief that finally she was safe and we could look at longer term care.  My sister had spoken to the doctor on the ward asking for their social work to liaise with mum's care management to try and get other aids in place to help support her return to home in the future - this was agreed.  We also phoned H&SC Care Management to advise of this too and they said that was fine.  The doctor also mentioned a 'no capacity' certificate, which my sister agreed to.  We thought this would be really helpful as they advised it could be used for up to 3 years and would help us maybe get longer term care for my mum. 

We were so surprised when on Sunday my sister received a phone call to have my mum discharged.  My sister asked if she could be transferred to a cottage hospital but were advised she wasn't bad enough for that.  They were adamant that mum was up walking about in the ward and had been assessed and was fine to go home. So we trusted the professionals with this and said we would pick her up - as we realise beds are at a premium. 

We were also concerned she was being discharged on a Sunday as we couldn't get in touch with Care Management for extra aids or assessment . The care provider was brilliant and managed to reinstate my mum's supper care.  I asked about the 'no capacity' certificate and was advised that we wouldn't get it as mum had delirium (although they couldn't definitely say she had a UTI) and therefore it wouldn't count going forward.  I tried to explain that my mum has vascular dementia and has had for 10 years.  The nurse spoke to the doctor who seemingly said the same - therefore we have another uphill battle of trying to get this from the GP now.

On us getting to the hospital mum was so happy to be going home and struggled slightly to go from the chair to the wheelchair - but we still thought the professionals must be right.  I took her home and managed to get her out of the car and into her house taking it very slowly.  Once in her house she was complaining of a sore back (which all the professionals we saw at every point have said is muscular but she has been complaining of since her fall) and started furniture surfing and it was obvious she was struggling with her mobility still.  As we have explained to everyone at the hospital, my mum is left after her last carer from 6pm until approx 9/10am in the morning and as family we don't believe she is safe.  

The carer went in the next day and found her lying on the floor beside her bed and soaking wet.  We don't know for how long, they couldn't get her up and had to phone ARCH responders (who cover a vast area).  Once up my sister came in and helped the carer shower my mum, who is in agony complaining of back and now hip pain.  She is unable to walk properly.

As a family we are extremely disappointed and angry with now 2 failed discharges by NHS Grampian and felt we have had no option to put up this feedback.  We are not unreasonable people and realise the pressures on the NHS and H&SC but despair at the type of treatment we have experienced the elderly receiving.  As a family, we are not medical professionals, we have to listen and take on board what we are told and make decisions based on this, but we also believe that medical professionals have to listen to what families are saying - right now it feels like they only seem interested in getting bed space freed up.  I'm flabbergasted that the hospital felt my mum's mobility was good enough for her to go home and the morning after just proved that they were wrong - so again another failed discharge by ARI with my mum left at high risk.