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It’s still early days but I will get there and keep fighting

Posted By Lizzy234

"It’s still early days but I will get there and keep fighting"

About: CGL Birmingham / North Hub

(as a service user),

Immersive Reader

I've struggled with alcohol since my early twenties, I had a disabled child in my late teens and suffered sexual abuse as a child, I started to use alcohol to self medicate and found myself dependent on it.

It ended up with my mom taking care of my son and me almost dying I lost count of hospital detoxes, I was broken and I gave up on life attempting suicide a few times. Desperate for rehab I finally went in for 12 weeks I was determined to do it.

CGL thankfully offered me another 12 weeks so in all I was in rehab for 6 and a half months. During this time I have learnt so much, faced my past and have a better outlook on life, there’s so much to live for and it’s so nice too not wake up withdrawing having too drink alcohol puking, alcohol & puking to even function, I will never forget that dark place.

Not many people had much hope but I’m continuing doing a day at a time and my family are glad they have the old me back. My son now has his mom again and finally I can live again, thanks to CGL. I was turning up there unexpectedly with my pillow lying in the reception refusing to move, I was in trouble with the police for drunken things I didn’t remember. It was just mayhem and so much more happened but I’m just glad I’m out of it now, and I wanna carry on with my life.

Wayne was amazing key worker he had patience with me and Rachel the nurse. The states I was in going there I feel embarrassed looking back but just pray to god I won’t be like that again. It was horrible and sad looking back, I’m 154 days sober today it’s still early days but I will get there and keep fighting.

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Responses

Response from Lydia Broom, Service User Involvement Lead at Change Grow Live Birmingham, The Service User Involvement Team, Change Grow Live Birmingham nearly 2 years ago
Lydia Broom
Service User Involvement Lead at Change Grow Live Birmingham, The Service User Involvement Team,
Change Grow Live Birmingham

Submitted on 30/10/2023 at 11:12
Published on Care Opinion at 11:12

Immersive Reader
picture of Lydia Broom

Dear Lizzy234

Thank you so much for getting in touch with us and being so open to share your experiences.

I'm Lydia and I work in the team at Change Grow Live Birmingham that listens and responds to people's feedback.

Your story shows that you have been through some incredibly difficult and challenging times in your life. It sounds like you have been fighting against your need for self-medication and alcohol dependency for many years and I cannot even begin to imagine how tough this battle must have been.

I was sorry to read about what you have been through as a child, and I’m aware that many people who are currently struggling with an alcohol dependency will have been through similar experiences. It’s really positive to read that accessing rehab allowed you some much-needed time and space to process how your past experiences had been impacting on your life. I hope that other people who are struggling for the same reasons, will read your story and recognise that if they speak up and get the right support to address what happened, that they too can get into recovery and move forwards.

I appreciate why you may look back on some of your behaviour whilst you were still drinking and feel embarrassed. When people are under the influence of alcohol, especially with the extra pressure of having to worry about physical withdrawal symptoms, people can and do behave in ways that are challenging. The way you behaved back then when you were drinking, does not define you as a person, and everyone who was supporting you at the time would have known this. As time goes by, I hope those uncomfortable memories fade so that you can start looking back less and looking forwards more. I am sure that as the years roll on, those memories will be outshone by much more positive ones that you and your son and family members will grow to cherish.

Your words about Wayne and Rachel are lovely. Recovery does not happen overnight, and it was amazing to read that you felt they showed the patience you needed, as you were trying to make such a huge change. I will make sure they both get to read your words, and that their managers do too. I’m sure they will feel hugely appreciative of your kind feedback and incredibly honoured to have been part of your journey.

Lizzy234, you are living proof that with the right support and personal strength to fight back against an alcohol dependency and the underlying reasons behind it, that a life can be turned around and that brighter days will come. I hope you feel incredibly proud of everything you have achieved for both you and your son, as considering everything you have been through, you really should.

I hope that that as you continue fighting, that this will get easier and that you’ll add many weeks, months and years onto your abstinence time. As you continue to grow and work on your recovery, I’m sure that lots of positive life experiences and opportunities will come your way and it sounds like you are readier than ever, to grab these with both hands and not let them go.

Thank you again for reaching out to us about your experiences and I wish you all the very best for the future.

Take care, stay strong and feel proud every single day!

Lydia

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