"Learning how addiction is a family disease"

I was feeling quite desperate about what to do when our son was unreachable during a drug fuelled binge. I feared for his safety and life. He thought he was in control and saying I will stop tomorrow but the drugs were controlling him. Although he had taken drugs on and off for some years we hadn't witnessed such a prolonged episode and naively thought he had recovered. I knew that support groups had helped me in the past and through an addictions nurse specialist at Frimley Park Hospital I was given the number for Inclusion, who put me in touch with Parent Support Link.

From the very first phone call with Paul, I realised how little knowledge I had of addiction and the impact on family members. He was able to communicate this in a supportive but direct way. He immediately picked up on what was going on and how it was affecting us. He helped me understand what happens when a family member is in active addiction. We worked out some coping strategies and options. He helped us to carefully choose the words and phrases that we were comfortable to use. To observe actions not words. To have the confidence not to give money when asked, begged or pleaded. To support recovery but not enable addiction. I felt supported and the increased awareness gave me some confidence to deal with the situation day to day. It was invaluable leading up to the rehab that our son came to realise he needed and after as well. Rehab is only the first step on the road to recovery - another learning step - it's not a quick fix, rather a lifelong commitment.

I was then invited to attend support groups for family members run by Paul and also well being sessions run by Nicky and later Michelle. These were all insightful and gave us practical tips and skills to help us navigate through the chaos that is addiction. It was helpful to meet others who had similar feelings; we understood what everyone was going through. During this time it became ever more obvious that addiction is not only about the addict - the illness extends to all family members albeit in different ways. Yet family members are so often ignored or not given the support they need.

I believe services that Parent Support Link offer should be available to any family members and I commend the team and the work that they do. I am forever grateful for the support.