"Poor maternity care"

I received antenatal care at Ninewells Hospital from week 12 of my pregnancy to the early third trimester. My first scan was a generally unpleasant experience as the ultrasound technician just seemed to be having a bad day and blamed their inability to get some readings on me having a high BMI. I had two private scans prior to this with no issues and much clearer pictures with nicer technicians so I don’t believe my weight actually impacted on the scan at all. Also, I was half a point above the normal BMI, which was I feel was held against me the whole time I was at Ninewells for my care.

I was diagnosed with gestational diabetes in the second trimester and the whole experience went downhill from there. The diabetic nursing team were incredible and explained clearly that GD is not weight related and related to the placenta and explained that I would have slightly more monitoring to ensure my baby wasn’t going to be unwell when born and I was happy with this.

When I had my first appointment with the dietician and consultant I was told that I was extremely overweight, I was eating too much and I had no choice but to have a medical birth. I had originally wanted a home birth and when I couldn’t have that I asked for a water birth instead. The consultant actually scoffed at this idea and told me I’d be on the consultant lead unit and would be induced unless I wanted to risk harming my baby. I feel I was constantly berated about my weight and what I ate every week on a phone call with a dietician, to the point that I was starving myself at home because I couldn’t handle the stress of eating.

Thankfully, as I live in Fife, I saw different midwives through my GP who picked up on my low mood and overwhelming anxiety. I eventually explained how I was made to feel by the medical Ninewells team and how the consultant would regularly ask the dietician in the appointment their opinion on what medial choices I had available to me and how I was starving myself at home. I explained that at this point, at the start of my third trimester, I was terrified to give birth in Ninewells because I genuinely didn’t feel like I was going to be listened to at any point during the birth, since I hadn’t been listened to at any point before that.

The midwives were understandably horrified and offered a transfer of care to Fife, which I gladly accepted. I had one more appointment with the consultant and dietician before my care was transferred due to timing and during the appointment I expressed that I didn’t feel that the consultant had my best interests in mind and would be a risk to me and my baby if they were allowed to continue with my care.

I explained this to a midwife who weighed me and did my blood sugar pre-appointment and to the ultrasound midwife, who both apologised on the consultant's behalf and were not surprised I was changing hospital. I was sent for multiple ultrasounds during my appointments as the consultant was fixated on me having a big baby because of my weight and assumed eating habits. Every single ultrasound showed that my baby was measuring at the national average and I was assured of this by the ultrasound midwife and by a private clinic that I attended for a second opinion.

I found the mixed messages I received from this consultant in particular  horrifying, one minute they told me that fat people deserve good care too, and then the next minute I was going to have a giant baby, and then they told me my baby was suddenly small and it was potentially due to medication that I am on for migraines which was approved during the first trimester of my pregnancy and was actually signed off by another antenatal consultant. I was made to feel irrational and hypersensitive, and I was lucky that I could have other people in the appointments with me who can corroborate my experience. 

When I was transferred to Fife - Kirkcaldy to be exact - my experience was night and day. Every doctor, midwife, nurse and ultrasound staff apologised for my experience in Ninewells and went what I thought was above and beyond for me, however when I listen to other people who received maternity care at Kirkcaldy I realise this is just their normal way of working. I was given the choice of what to do with my birth, I was told to eat and that I wouldn’t be harassed every week and my weight was a complete non-issue to everyone.

I had a beautiful pain relief free birth after a midwife led induction, which I chose on my terms, and I felt empowered through every step of it. I used hypnobirthing which is supported in Fife by every staff member I spoke to. The consultant at Ninewells rolled their eyes at me when I mentioned hypnobirthing and said I should be realistic and think about an epidural. I would not have had the same experience at Ninewells and I genuinely believe I would have either been forced into an unsafe induction, forced into an unnecessary c-section or my baby and I would have come to harm under this consultant.

I obviously can’t comment on the wards or labour suite in Ninewells, but the run up to the birth was a good enough indicator for me that I would not have been provided dignity, respect or safe or even adequate care. I was a nurse myself before this, so I do know how patients should be treated.