"Mental Health Services in A&E"

I attended A&E due to poor mental health. Having recently found out about a family bereavement. Which happened more than a month ago. I hadn't been told. This added with a lot of other things has left me feeling extremely hopeless. I attended my local A&E. After being triaged I waited to be called.

Late in the evening, a staff member came to the waiting area, scanned all the people, then walked to another waiting area. Did the same and came back. They were clearly looking for me. They then came looking again and went outside of the entrance for at least 5 minutes. On returning they were having a video call on their mobile. Laughing and joking with a receptionist. Turning the phone so they could see the other person on the video call.

The staff member then walked towards the office before coming back soon after. Looking straight at me and calling my name.

I go over and ask if they were looking for me. They said yes and I asked where they went. Because not once was my name called. They had walked around looking as if they couldn't find me. They responded saying they were making sure we had a room. To which I asked if they meant in the carpark.

They continued to say they weren't sure if there was a room ready. I have had this before where in my opinion, staff walk around pretending they can't see you, not calling your name and going back to say they can't see you to the other staff.

I told them I wanted to see someone else, to which they said it wasn't possible because there isn't another person. I responded by saying there was because I had seen them. The staff member said they are with someone else. I made it clear I was happy to wait.

After a few minutes they returned and called across to me asking if they can have a quick chat. I called back and said not right now. They then told me the other staff member isn't available at all. Basically, if I don't see them, I won't see anyone. So, I said I would leave.

Before I left, I spoke with the nurse who first triaged me. I needed to share what had just happened and how this should not be happening. I came for help because I was feeling suicidal and struggling to see a reason to continue. Did they bother to think that I came for help or just assume I was wasting time.

This is a regular occurrence and I have been traumatised by the whole mental health system. It feels as if we are seen as the problem or that we want attention. It is the opposite. I feel there are too many staff who don't have the compassion and understanding needed. It feels like a toxic environment where it's common to turn a blind eye or make excuses.

When will people be heard and treated as a person and not drain on services & society. There is more harm than help. That is the reality of it. With people being let down or dismissed. Leading to more suffering and sadly many have lost their lives.