"Complete lack off assistance and compassion."

During a visit to Raigmore Ward 9A for extreme discomfort and pain during my first successful pregnancy, after 3 different times being seen and multiple times on the phone I was finally  told to stay in. (Not that I wanted to, but I wanted them too be able to monitor me to see if they could figure it all out easier since I’m there)

The whole complete time even when I called in to go in, I felt completely undermined and  left to feel like my feelings,  emotions or physical health were invalid. When describing how I felt I was advised that that is what pregnancy is or that I would be fun when I get further on” or if they see and hear from you this much now, what will it be be like at 30+ weeks.  To me these were snide comments that can easily be passed off but the tone and way being presented was not as easily passed off.

I’m not a argumentative patient and I was being a nice as possible but after the way I was being spoken to, the feeling that I was wasting their time put me to tears right in-front off the doctor who thankfully made me feel better.

My problem with this ward is that some of the  midwives seemed to have a horrible attitudes, no compassion for first time mums or anyone in general.  I was kept in and they had to do bloods.  One staff member was ready to take bloods but then looked at me, said they weren't doing it and and they would  get someone else.  They walked off and it wasn't done  for hours later.  I was left in a room,  not monitored, heavily spewing so much that I was  wetting myself and left to figure out something as there was no towels and no one would react to the button I pressed.

Thankfully my partner came with clothes and stuff I could clean myself with. Leading up to this stay also when I was talking on the phone with a midwife. I was in agony and had no clue what to do but they said they had  a lot to do, implying  for me to end the call. I just said I would  call if it gets worse. 

Recently I called as my midwife thought I had a few symptoms of something that wasn't  named.  I was asked my symptoms and I  told them one.  They said to stop there and ruled out a number of conditions.  I was completely flabbergasted at being shut down so quickly.  I didn't feel listened or heard.   

I suffer with my mental health and this triggered me. I felt like I was going to die with how low and unheard,  isolated and sad I felt. These are feelings I try to avoid but when the people that are there to help act like this is spirals me. This affects me daily and I’m very well capable off knowing when to react and not and how to keep myself stable but this affected me badly; not feeling heard, not listened to, not helped, it was horrific.

There are some lovely staff and amazing service there! But I find some of them speak in an unpleasant way. The waiting process is unacceptable - I believe because there’s only one doctor in the whole pregnancy care centre.  Hats off to that doctor, but a young in pain pregnant woman being in that ward for almost 6 hours just to be told there nothing wrong and it's very minor, but still in agony, having to travel there from quite a distance for a 9:00am appointment that was very short and then having  to wait almost 6 hours is ridiculous.  I was starving, sick,dizzy and constantly in pain and peeing isn’t the most comfortable situation for pregnant woman that have a 10 min appointment and then end up there for almost 6 hours.  It was horrible .

I do understand the business and the overwhelming amount of work but the staff know this and at least need to work on their compassion and care .

In the end that’s the treatment people remember most.