"Upset by the lack of support"

I gave birth to my son in 2021, this was my first pregnancy so I was nervous and excited for his birth and hoping for a good birth experience. Unfortunately he had Strep B when he was born which I understand is no one’s fault. However, it could have been picked up on early in my pregnancy by a simple swab. It was very upsetting to find out the NHS no longer offers these swabs in pregnancy. I felt let down that my son was ill with something potentially so serious when it was completely avoidable.

During my labour my temperature spiked extremely high and both myself and my son had to be given antibiotics. Bloods were also taken from my son which was when the Strep B was found. Bloods were taken regularly from my son for the remainder of our time in the hospital and my son was frequently returned to me with blood on his clothes and not dressed properly. Having my son constantly taken away was very difficult for me and it was made worse by the lack of care shown to him when he was away from me.

When I gave birth (Nov 2021), the hospital was still operating Covid visiting. While I understand the desire to limit infection I don’t think my needs as a new mother were considered. All new mothers need support after giving birth and I particularly needed it as I was so unwell myself. I now know that I had sepsis but this was not communicated to me at any stage of my stay in hospital and I only found out 18 months later when another doctor saw it in my notes. Only two 2 hour visits were permitted each day which left me completely alone with my new baby 20 hours a day. This made it very difficult for me and my partner to bond with our son as he has such limited time with us and I was trying to recover myself.

I was understandly upset by the lack of support I had and my son being ill, however, when I tried to express this to midwives I was told to get a grip as other people had it worse. At the time I was too unwell to really take it in, but looking back this is appalling from the staff who are meant to be supporting new mothers. Unfortunately, this behaviour wasn’t a one off, I was made to feel embarrassed and weak by staff for wanting support either from them or my partner. Staff also made me feel like I was a bad mum when I asked about when my son and I would be able to go home. I was told I need to take Strep B seriously as a baby downstairs had just died from it. This was extremely upsetting as I didn’t even want to consider the possibility that my baby would die and the only reason I had asked about going home was because I was struggling so badly with the isolation of being in hospital, not because I believe Strep B to be a minor illness.

I found most midwives to be very unhelpful and would take hours to bring basic things like milk. While I absolutely understand how busy a maternity ward is, I don't feel it's acceptable to be without such basic essentials for so long. After a few days my partner started to buy ready made milk and bring it to the hospital as it was clear we couldn’t rely on the midwives in the ward.

The situation became so bad that my family contacted the ward during my stay because they were so concerned for my mental health. Following this, staff did allow my partner to stay but it was made very clear to us that this was an inconvenience despite me having being in a single room for my whole stay.

Communication between staff on the ward was also terrible. With every shift change I would have to explain my situation over again, this was very frustrating as it felt like the staff were unprepared and relying on patients to provide information.

This experience has left me with extreme anxiety surrounding hospitals and I now cannot enter a hospital on my own without experiencing panic attacks. This has meant that when I had my second child recently I did everything possible to try to ensure we wouldn’t be kept in hospital as I was terrified of experiencing the same situation again.

On top of the other issues, the food was very poor. I am vegetarian and have an allergy to beans and chickpeas and at one point the only meal offered to me was a cold salad consisting of iceberg lettuce and chopped boiled egg. This doesn’t really constitute a full meal under the best of circumstances and certainly not in winter for someone who has just given birth and was unwell. My family had to bring us meals every day, often a takeaway, which was expensive and not very healthy but was at least warm and filling.

Overall, I have been left with no faith in the maternity unit at QEUH and a poor impression of NHS maternity care overall.