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"Amazing care for my husband and dad before their passing"

About: Forest Holme

(as other),

My first introduction to Forest Holme was in August 2020 when my darling husband of 42 years, aged 62, having been diagnosed with Pulmonary Fibrosis in June 2019, had been transferred from the main hospital after  his condition had worsened. We had had the shocking news that he had a life expectancy of 6 months. He had lived in a motor home, on his own, on our driveway during the first Covid lockdown due to me working as frontline NHS staff. If he contracted COVID he was told that he would not survive because of the severity of his illness. This was his decision. 

Forest Holme’s staff were amazing, not only were they supporting my husband, but also me. Unfortunately our children were unable to visit at that time due to the COVID restrictions. 

He came on in leaps and bounds. There were so many services available during his stay in the Hospice with mental, physical and pastoral care, physio and many more, more or less on tap. And that care was also available for me too, including the counselling service that I partook in. 

The staff became friends and were always there for us both. Thankfully he was discharged home (and it was a condition  from me that he  came back into the house!) Because of the oxygen he needed, our conservatory became his new home. At this stage I went sick from my profession, so I could care for him at home.

My father had been living with us since September 2018. He’d returned to Scotland when he retired with my mother, but had been treated for  kidney cancer (having had the cancerous kidney removed whilst in Scotland) and had asked if he could come back and live with us (my mother died in 1989).

Initially he was doing amazing, but around the same time as my husband’s diagnosis was succumbing to the cancer. Again Forest Holme welcomed him into their care. Both him and my husband had several admittances over those next few weeks with my dearest dad passing 10 days before my husband. Because my dad was end of life, me, my sister and brother could visit all the time. Unfortunately because my husband was not end of life, during the second lockdown I couldn’t visit him. So our contact was mainly WhatsApp video. 

However, despite the hospice not thinking my husband was end of life , they invited me in where I stayed all night and was with him alone, when he died. I cannot express what it felt to be with him. I know the wonderful staff were shocked at his passing and they very kindly called me with their condolences. 

Our children were also able to come in and say goodbye after his passing. 

It is still very raw, but thank you from the bottom of my heart for you care, support and amazing love you give us all. 

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Responses

Response from Beverley Lee, Consultant in Palliative Medicine, Forest Holme Hospice, University Hospitals Dorset NHS Foundation Trust 2 years ago
Beverley Lee
Consultant in Palliative Medicine, Forest Holme Hospice,
University Hospitals Dorset NHS Foundation Trust

doctor

Submitted on 05/05/2023 at 22:14
Published on Care Opinion on 09/05/2023 at 08:22


Thank you for taking the time to share your experience.

Many thanks for your kind words about our hospice and our teams. I'm glad we were able to support you, your husband, father and family.

I'm sorry that during Covid-19 Pandemic visiting was not as open as we would normally wish for, but I am glad you were able to spend precious time with both your husband and father.

We are fortunate to now offer open visiting again.

The team meets on a weekly basis and we will share your story with everyone. It is very much appreciated.

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