"Giving up"

I was referred to Canada House shortly after my third child was born. Having suffered borderline post part in psychosis after my second and having ongoing mental health issues for years the mother and infant mental health team decided that a specialist for my borderline personality disorder would be best. This was early December 2018. It is not the end of August 2019 and I haven’t heard a single thing. No assessments, no appointments, no calls or emails. I even begged my GP to refer me again to see if it would help and still nothing another 6 months later. I understand that they’re busy but there is no harm in making contact and allowing someone to know whether they are on the waiting list or not. I have no been mentally well for such a long time. I have attempted suicide, I have self harmed and I have acted out in ways that are not healthy to control my feelings. I want to get the help I need for the benefit of my 3 young children. I’m currently not even on medication as my GP keeps putting them on a standard prescription and getting another appointment precooked has to be 2 months in advance now so I can never get enough to keep going until I get another appointment. I have read some of the other reviews by the people that have been seen and it appears that even after being seen treatment is brushed off to get the next patient in. I am terrified. I am absolutely terrified of being brushed off. I can’t live like this. I can’t even leave me house alone anymore, I won’t. Even if it’s important that I do, I can’t. I need help. So many people need help. Why is nobody helping us?! We need the support more than ever and it just isn’t there. I hear about other boroughs of the council having better mental health facilities so why is ours lacking so much? Why is everyone getting pushed aside as fine when they’re even having the one suicidal thought? That’s not ok? And then what about the rest of us? I am doing my best to keep it together and I really mean that but I am struggling and my children are going to be affected in time and I do not want that. Why is there nobody helping us and making us feel like we matter as patients? All we want is help.