"Remember Remember the 5th of November: Please Plan-Et With Care"

Hi, I'm A Catherine Wheel and access adult local mental health services in Nottingham, City East, via the Stonebridge Centre.

Remember Remember the 5th of November: Please Plan- Et With Care 

This post concerns care plans. As A Catherine Wheel these plans are intended to light up the night sky in a Tropical Storm, follow the firework code, and ensure my return on a Silver Cloud to Burning Bush with the lead professional who Astra-nomically manages my care. My bonfire is piled high on a Standard care pathway, so the consultant psychiatrist is privileged, (sic(k), probably), to be my leading pro.

Please spare a thought for this consultant, Dr Fawkes. Fireworks come with government warnings about taking care, and how lighting up can seriously damage your health. And this is without the mission impossible of giving Dr Fawkes two distinct jobs to do in one consultation. To be a psychiatrist, or not to be a care manager, that is the issue. If the cap fits and all that. But no wonder Dr Fawkes seems worn out having to frequently exchange two stylish hats like that during the brief lives of one appointment. The other hazards we two Shooting Stars must face include:

1. When we consult in our Mystic Cone at the Stonebridge Centre, Dr Fawkes considers my considerable flare under the psychiatrist’s hat. When the hurly-burly’s done Dr Fawkes makes a decision of 17 weeks, 6, 9, 12 month's time, for when we two shall meet again. How long, how long does my care plan last? Where oh where did the other hat go? Lost to A Thunder Clap in Golden Rain.   

2. A Firefly on a Whistle Stop told me that the list at the end of my gp letter is my “care” “plan”. Didn’t the Institute of Mental Health research Care Plans a few years ago? Could have got lost in that Snow Storm on Mount Vesuvius I suppose.

3.Don’t try this at home, but have you ever got hold of Dr Fawkes in between the appointments? Jumping Jacks and Jumping Jills doesn’t come into it. As A Catherine Wheel I can get stuck mid-spin, despite my best fizz fizzles. Left sooo looong with this care plan, even my Olympic Torch, and that Mighty Atom hitting the Jackpot might not suffice. Oh Dr Fawkes, unbelievable as this might Rocket for you, sometimes I just want to say: hello, Harlequin. Regrettably even that Super Sonic Bang of Halley’s Comet doesn't get me that earlier appointment with you.

4.If any Smasher out there has phoned and been put through to Dr Fawkes directly, tell me how you did this, in Dragon’s Fire on a post card, please.

5. There’s things you need to know about psychiatrists. Their local knowledge and networking is for other purposes, and they don’t get out the Mystic Cone much. It’s the Trust’s fault, underneath their Floodlight, beside the Standard Traffic Light. How can the Trust expect psychiatrists to help with saucing Golden Fountains, Roman Candles, and bonfire locations for me to lighten up the social inclusion, if our Trust confines its Dr Fawkeses like this? And it’s a Boomer of a Screecher for A Catherine Wheel to have to meet in a tiny clinical setting to plan a care full roasting. I long to meet Dr Fawkes in one of those costing a lotta cafes to Cannon the plan. I’d stomp up for the skinniest of refreshment to share a Chrysanthemum Fountain and Crackers served on a Flying Saucer with my leading pro. 

6. Well, there’s a plan. I’ve gone according to plan (imaginatively). Now we need to review this plan. Please re-read the above. My fuse is running short.

7. I’m not sure Dr Fawkes, if you like me DIYing my care plans. And I know they are threadbare without you. Ages ago I found out my leading pro could also be a cpn, or social worker. Dr Fawkes, why didn’t you tell me? Didn’t you want me to make a Highball choice? Doesn’t seem right, you know, for you to have been given these two hatted hazards, and for both of us to undertake missions impossible. Still, would be great though if we could spend time on these plans, teamwork together, share the stories, and remember remember the 5th of November. Plan et with care.

8. You know what, I’m going to ask the Trust to think about this. Meanwhile Dr Fawkes, I reckon we’ve earned some Golden Delight, don’t you? 

A Catherine Wheel

In the Certain Ages, with nothing to lose and everything to gain.

(Source: 1950/60 firework names: pinterest.co.uk/nickfire/vintage-fireworks/ Accessed online: 3:24 Thursday 18 July 2019)