"PTSD"

I was induced at Stepping Hill. After pushing for a long time and presumably not much happening, the staff decided an assisted delivery was required. The baby was fine and not in any distress, the only problem was slow progress so the intervention was not an emergency, however the midwife did not decide to briefly inform me of their decision or explain it. This would have prevented my shock at lots of people suddenly entering the room at once, and me being informed a ventouse delivery was going to be done just seconds beforehand. No consent was asked for or given. I also had what I saw referred to on my notes as an "extensive" episiotomy. I was not even told this was going to happen, let alone asked for my consent. My long but fairly calm labour ended in a very traumatic event which could have been completely avoided if the midwife had just taken a moment to tell me what was happening. I now feel I am showing strong signs of PTSD and keep remembering how she kept leaving the room, maybe to plan all of this while I was left unaware. I also remember how she left the room while I was pushing and think why didn't she just tell me not to bother. Of course the baby wasn't going to come out if she was leaving the room, otherwise it would have fallen on the floor! I am also left wondering what exactly an extensive episiotomy is... I don't even know what exactly has been done to me. And sadly am too fearful now to consider having any more children. I have requested a copy of the medical notes to understand what happened and have been waiting over 2 months for these. I want to read the notes alone in the first instance and do not want to see them for the first time in the setting of a debrief meeting. However I am not sure how else I can get the notes so any advice on that would be appreciated.