"Pacemaker fitting at the conquest hospital"

Last week I attended the cardiology department to have a pacemaker fitted, on entering the ward I was greeted by 2 nurses. These 2 nurses were extremely good in all ways nothing was too much for them. They made me feel calm and explained what was happening. My time came to go into theatre and I felt calm and relaxed. Once in theatre it was a different matter. I have never felt so alone and frightened. No one talks to you personally. This procedure is done under local anaesthetic so you can hear all what is being said. To hear that the pocket was too big they couldn't get the wire in and that they had cut into a muscle. What else was I going to hear. I hadn't had sedation as I felt I didn't need it but I was feeling pain and obviously my body was showing signs of this. To then be told by the surgeon that "" you don't get a medal just because you don't have sedation" I was very tearful by this time.. I then had sedation but still was well aware of what was going on. To hear that the Dr needed help was far from reassuring. I felt that the Dr doing the op was not capable of doing this operation. By the time I came out I was still very upset I felt that I had been a lump of meat on a butchers slab. The 2 nurses back on the ward were shocked at my reaction when I came out. They were there to comfort me made me feel human again lots of reassurance . Another nurse came to me about my experience I explained how I felt. As soon as I was able to go home I went not a minute to soon. The next morning I didn't feel very well went to the drs and was sent back to have another X-ray . This was done. I was then taken to resus to be told I had a oft sided pneumothorax,where a chest drain had to be inserted. At least now I was being treated as a person not a lump of meat.