"Poor post birth care"

I had an elective caesarean at Kings in January - although a day early because I went into labour the day before the section was booked. 

I went into labour at 3:30am and was at the hospital at 6;00am.  I was admitted by a midwife, who checked the baby's heartbeat, confirmed that I still wanted the section, and put me in a bay.  I was left there without any further monitoring for three hours.  At 9:00 am, after three hours of contractions, I was found to be 4cm dilated and then whisked into theatre.  The theatre staff were all absolutely outstanding, and my son was born at 10:30am. 

I had, however, almost no post birth care. 

I was brought to the ward at midday.  A midwife stuck their head around the curtain to say they would be back but I never saw them again.  No one checked my catheter - I had been told that it would be removed within six hours.  No one came to assist with breastfeeding.  My baby did not latch well if at all, and was distressed throughout the night.  I had occasional visits from on call midwives, but no support. I could not sit up, had not slept in 24 hours, was dehydrated (but that was perhaps not a bad thing - my catheter bag was changed only once in 30 hours).

At noon the following day, another midwife came to tell me that I was going home today.  I had not slept, my baby had barely eaten.  My catheter was removed, and I was again left alone for the afternoon, apart from a new-born check for my son.  My son screamed in hunger until another patient gave me some formula for him. We were finally discharged at 8;00pm, at which point I was disoriented and confused. 

Although my son had a newborn check, his tongue tie was missed (I was told that he had none).  He again struggled to feed for five days, until we were readmitted on the advice of the community midwife, because he had lost 13% of his bodyweight.  

The care I received on returning to hospital was much better - we were kept in overnight, I was given a feeding plan and formula to supplement him, and we were discharged the following day.  The staff were keen to reassure me that it wasn't my fault.  Yet my son's feeding difficulties continued for a further four weeks until I finally had his tongue tie addressed privately - not only was this not my fault, but it was missed!  

The night my son was born was the loneliest of my life, and I am still struggling with the guilt.  I had no idea how to soothe him, no idea of how to breastfeed, and no sense that anyone was looking after us.  I am convinced that my second trip to hospital could have been avoided had proper care been taken the day he was born.