"Childbirth"

In October, 2021 I gave birth to my fourth baby. When I left two days later and came home I was dealing with a sort of PTSD from the labour. My community midwife read my notes and said that from reading the notes written by the midwives in the hospital, it sounded like they had attacked me. They didn't ask for my consent to perform checks, to stitch my lower area straight after birth with no anaesthetic, to push down extremely hard with no warning on my stomach to expel blood clots.  Medication was not given to me when I should of had it, eg, I had blood clots immediately after birth from haemorrhaging and the midwife informed me that they didn't have time to give me my clexine injections that day, it would be the next day with the next shift of nurses. I wasn't given my omeprazole when I was 2 days on the induction ward, which resulted in my spending my short labour with chest pain from the excess acid and then vomiting all over myself in the bed. I was asked to leave my room the day after giving birth (the previous evening before my baby was feeding correctly) as they needed my bed. They asked me to pack up midway through trying to feed my premature baby and wanted to move me to their staff room. I couldn't use this room, as they had another lady in there with her baby. I was sent home with clexine injection and was not shown how to use them, which resulted in me having a panic attack, due to the fear of using a needle and not treating the blood clots. Hours after I got home from the hospital, I phoned to ask how I administer the injections, only to be told if I couldn't do it, no one would do it for me and I had to just suck it up and get some Dutch courage. The next day, my midwife came and listened to my concerns about the Injections and my sons feeding, resulting in his losing weight. He was sucking on his tongue and not the bottle teat, as he was premature and didn't have his sucking reflex ready for going home. The midwife was very concerned about my mental health and encouraged me to write a complaint. I explained I wanted it to be over and I didn't want to write the complaint. They explained  that I could read my notes when I was ready so I could start to process my labour, as that morning I had a breakdown with flashbacks from my labour. Needless to say I never read the notes. My son is now 12 weeks old and the best baby you could imagine. I had always wanted a big family as I came from one myself, but after the treatment I received and the PTSD I have surrounding the labour, I will never have another baby again.