"Feeling let down"

I had my assessment in March after being referred by my GP. GP was great, listened and agreed to make referral.

Scottish Autism have really let me down. The assessors on the panel were very old fashioned in their thinking of Autism presentations, being told from one of the panel they couldn't see it (i.e. my Autism?!) And because I had no (obvious) issues in childhood and I could communicate with the panel, therefore I can't be Autistic. I was laughed at for making notes, even though I need notes to remind me of what I wish to say, to help me. I was told to stop making notes and that it's not Autism, just poor self-esteem. Told to go home and chill out. Also told that I don't want this diagnosis anyway, as it would stay with me the rest of my life.

If this practice is deemed acceptable, then I fear for all the other women who have been let down by their assessors. My health (mental and physical) has taken a turn for the worst since my assessment, due to the sheer frustration of being told I am not what I know myself to be. The assessors seem to think that a diagnosis is a bad/negative thing, when in actual fact, it would have helped me in understanding myself better and I could free myself from the guilt I've carried for the issues I've faced in the past.

I put in a complaint, and of course, the usual... they will learn from my experience! If that's the case, then why are there still women complaining about the very same things?

I didn't meet the diagnostic criteria... maybe then the diagnostic criteria needs looked at and altered to fit with the 21st century and the ever-changing medical field to include traits in women, as we all know they can be vastly different from the usual male presentations.

Deeply disappointed, lost, and will be complaining to the NHS about the service. Something needs done to change this practice/criteria! Too many women being told they are not Autistic when we know different, after all, I've experienced it my entire life!

And, unfortunately, as I've read on here AND elsewhere, sadly, I'm not the only one let down by the diagnostic criteria that is made for boys with typical indicators of male autism. The assessors should be aware that it is a spectrum, and that not every person will be 'obviously Autistic'?

Shocking and a real shame that I know I'm not the only one!