"CMHT coatbridge"

I have been struggling with low mood since august. Having to juggle this and having to return to uni (had to take a year out due to plans to hang myself) and move away again I haven't been able to get consistent care. When I returned home from the year out I tried to make contact with the CMHT in the area but I got given a cpn who just spoke about wellbeing exercises which wasn't useful for me, nothing else was offered.

Now that I'm back I was trying to get help because I didn't want to feel this way anymore. This has been since march. I understand the situation with covid but at the same time I also don't know why this is impacting help so much. The reason I'm writing this is I tried to OD yesterday, my parents who I live with walked in and I gave up the effort when they saw and phoned an ambulance, it would have been counter productive in my eyes to continue if 'help' was on the way.

I had already taken myself to a& e a month ago because of these feelings and it's only getting worse. I got picked up by the ambulance crew, thankfully they were very understanding and said they could see I needed help. They contacted the CMHT to see me but when I went there it all went downhill.

I don't know how long I was in a room with them, I felt they treated me like a child. I wouldn't agree to the plan of just taking more meds and just waiting, I'm past that point, I wasn't willing to give up my stash of meds because they have shown me countless times I don't matter with them and I'm done trying to fight. However since they couldn't get an agreement out of myself they went straight to my parents and said what they wanted me to agree to to them as if that was it. Then I was just sent away.

My homelife isn't great and something that adds to the worsening of my condition. They never once asked if I feel safe there. When I got back this caused more arguments, I had to leave this home and go stay with a friend, away from my stash but not away from my thoughts and an OD isn't the only way I have planned in the past. I'm sick and tired of their lack of concern, the people that are supposed to help and it feels like they just haven't bothered. The ambulance staff said I needed help and needed away from there, and the people they took me to just turned me away because I wouldn't agree to a plan that should have been put in place 2 months ago because they haven't done enough for me.