"Awful experience at times"

My son was stillborn at the women's in june. I had been feeling awful and told my midwife and consultant at my appointment the day before but was just told " will all be over soon" & " oh dear, your having a bad time of it". The following night I called ahead with severe pain and bleeding at 3am, when i arrived there was no one to even meet us. My partner asked security who told him " the wheelchairs are over there mate". we made our way upstairs and it took a further 10 mins for anyone to even answer the door. I was eventually told my son had no heartbeat and delivered him minutes later. I suffered a rare life threatening pregnancy condition and i must admit they did well to save me. I was there for 5 days and in that time all the midwives seemed to talk about was me & my partner. " your an unusual couple! How on earth did you meet?" one even asked me " where i met someone so much older?". My much loved and longed for child had just died and they wanted gossip, i felt very judged for my choice in partner on top of all my suffering. I have been unable to use their bereavement team or attend the meetings as i was made to feel so uncomfortable there. The team was great in getting the legal side of things sorted for us but then i was shut out. I think it was because they needed to see if i was going to 'make a fuss'. As soon as I'd had my debriefing 15 weeks later, they suddenly allowed me on the forum. Why?.